Today, a lot of people seem to complain about the amount of work they are expected to do. And the pressure to perform their job extraordinarily well gets greater with the present economic situation with retrentment still a threat although part of the world is on the verge of recovery. The danger of a job lost is heightened with increasing prices of everyday necessities.
How do we overcome the pressure that we face at our workplace? The work load cannot be lessened. However, our mind can be adjusted. We can change our attitude towards work.
At this point, I hear a voice from one part of the world demand,"Ai Wei! How do you expect that to be done,ah? Talk is easy, lo, but when it comes to the real thing, I still have this huge pile of files to look into. Just change my attitude and the whole pile of work disappears aah?"
Okay. You're right. It's not easy. Nobody said it's easy, alright. Changing attitude takes some effort. And you're right too that the pile of work will not disappear. It's not magic. You see, it's science. It's how the mind works.
Yes, it is how our mind works. You have a choice in everything you want that mind of yours to behave, or I should say to think. If you prefer to worry, all the worrying thoughts will enter at your command. If you wish to take action, then the mind would start to plan and ideas would come in and if you think that same situation is just the right opportunity for you to show how good you are, your mind will think of ways to finish the job well and it will be happily looking forward to possible rewards. Have you ever experienced that? No?
Then, perhaps, I can bring in a simpler illustration. Let's say that you are a bachelor boy or girl and you get to know a girl or boy. What's in your mind? Beautiful/Handsome? Like him/her? Attracted? Your mind ticks 'Yes'. She/He asks for your help to take her big heavy bags to the airport for her/him. No problem, you would say. Big bags are not a problem. It would be good exercise. You are happy to be asked. It could mean that the person likes me. You would do it. Here's the chance. What a blessing from God!
Aah, what if you had ticked a 'No'. Sorry, lah. I have so much work to do. The time of your plane's departure is not convenient for me to take you there. All kinds of excuses. And if somehow you get persuaded to do it, you would not be happy with the situation, thinking of the huge number of heavy bags to carry. how exhausted you would be. It would be real tiring. That could also be really depressing, right? See, the situation is the same but the attitude is different.
So, let us see what kind of attitude we can put into our work. First of all, let us be positive. How lucky you are to have your job! Well, you are financially secure. There's money to pay the bills. Not enough? That has nothing to do with your job. It has everything to do with money mangement. (I will write on that in another posting.)
Work is to be done. So, we do it. Yes, we put in the work that is expected of us. That is what we are paid to do. If our mind understands that, and we set our mind to it, then there will be no dillydallying at work. If we do our work concientiously, as expected, there will be no pressure, only tiredness. Who does not get tired after a hard day's work? Tiredness at the end of the day is good as it will give us a good night's sleep. No insomnia unless we think of the work negatively. then, perhaps, we may think of kicking the employer the whole night instead of enjoying a good night's sleep.
And if we have worked hard, nobody can expect us to do more than that. So, whatever can not be completed has to be put aside for another day. If you have done your job well, the employer would understand. If the employer cannot understand that, then that employer's business will suffer when his workers run to another company. He and his company will not last.
Look at the banks. Business is always coming in but they have to put a stop to it at a certain time of the day so that the work can be completed. They understand that their workers can only do that much. And if the business is managed well, there is always another day to get more business.
Let us understand that pressure from work comes about when we feel or think that we have been given an unfair amount of work; we have been overloaded with too much work and expected to finish in too short a time. You do not agree, do you?
Okay, let's look at a hawker. The more work his customers give him, getting him to fry non-stop, demanding that they be served fast, the happier he is at the end of the day when he looks at the amount of cash he had gained. Is that overworked, pressured to perform faster hawker stressed or depressed with his workload? No! Far from it. He's delighted with his tiring work.
"Aaah! But that is physical work. It does not tax the mind."
Yeah? How about petition writers who work for themselves? If you see a good popular one with loads of work, ask him whether he is ever too stressed or depressed with his/her work. I do not believe such people would ever feel stressed or depressed with their work. For such people, the more work the happier; slightly stressed maybe, tiring too but happy. Certainly not overly stressed.
See, it's not the amount of work that overstresses a person. It is the thought that the workload is unfair, that too little time is given to complete it. It's the thinking that determines the attitude.
Sometimes, even when the workload is unfair, there is no overstress. Why? If you decide you love a particular type of work, that work becomes a pleasure. You may be tired by the load but your pleasure is not diminished.
Sometimes, it is pride in one's work, in one's achievement. A coach may be willing to work extra hours without extra pay in order to produce athletes with exceptional capabilities. A teacher may put in extra effort to achieve a yearly hundred percent passes for his subject. Why would these people walk the extra mile? It is love, pride and achievement that brings a lot of tiredness and fatique perhaps, but no depression or overstress.
Why do I emphasise on overstress? You see, some stress is good for us. There has to be some stress when we want to please someone, to achieve something better, to show that we are as good as others, if not better. Such types of stress brings us a positive feeling to help us perform well in whatever we wish to do.
It is only too much stress that we wish to avoid as such stress wreaks havoc on our mind and can cause our body to release too much hormones and toxins that can bring sickness to us.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Strong legs and a healthy body into the future.
When it comes to exercise and strength building, my mind goes back to my teenage days when I was a member of the Penang Youth Club. It was there that I went from Dynamic Tension to weights for strength training.
In my earlier posts you have been told that my childhood weakened me with a number of sicknesses that left me a scrawny kid. Having known the pain and suffering of sickness, the terrible inability to perform due to weakness, I had determined to take action to overcome my situation.
In those days, there was this Mr. Universe. Charles Atlas, who sculpted his body his way with a method known as Dynamic Tension. Later, I discovered the Penang Youth Centre and its weight training.
I must say that weight-training is one of the best strength developing method I know of. Within two solid years of training, I was a changed person with muscles to show, strength to take part and be good at running long distances, gymnastics and rugby as well as other games. It definitely made a difference in my life. I was more confident too. with my ability to perform in more things, especially those which require strength. And My health is so good that i have not had to see a doctor for more than thirty years because of some sickness. The benefits remain with me to this day.
However, there was a weakness in me. Like a good number of weight-trainees, I concentrated more on my arms, chest, stomach and back. I did do leg exercises but that was with minimum effort put in.
As I grow older, I realise the importance of strong legs. Now I am sixty-three and if I hope to live many more years, I certainly would not like to spend those years sliding slowly one foot forward after another around. A worse scenario could find me laying in front of the television with it watching me most of the time. No! I would prefer to die rather than suffer such indignity. So, to live life to the full, I must look after my legs and make sure they are strong enough to carry me wherever I wish to go till death part me from my legs and body.
As we grow older, we still need a strong body, However, we would have to depend upon our legs even more to still go places, climb things, have a good balance with steady legs and jump for joy or over anything in our path. And I believe we can always remain as agile and strong if we continue with our regular exercise and strength training.
Sometimes weakness from age is all in the mind. I remember someone telling me not to run so fast at the age of forty-five. Then, at the age of fifty, someone told me to walk slowly. Now at sixty-three, I have not slowed down at all although, every now and then, there is someone who would, with great concern, tell me to not run as I might fall. Why should I fall? It is all in the mind of these people that everything must slow down with age. Well, i have not and I will not slow down. As for myself, I have made up my mind to run, jump and vault till the day I just cannot do them. Then, and only then, will I walk briskly around.
In fact, I do more strengthening exercises for my legs than ever before and I am pleased with my health. My friends and I are fortunate to have a hill to trek and run up and down each morning. Thank God for he is certainly looking after our needs. What more can anyone ask for?
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Walk your pain away.
This morning, at the Sungai Pasir hill, I met a lady masseur who told me about a client of hers. This client of hers came not for a massage but to tell her that he no longer needed a massage as he did not suffer from his usual pains and aches. He told her that he had taken up horse-riding. But then, that was a really expensive way to overcome pain as it cost a lot of money to maintain a horse.
Yes, horse-riding can be an expensive way to exercise. But then, we have so many types of exercises we can do to overcome pain. Brisk walking is one of them.
Before I go further, I wish to stress on the word 'brisk'. According to my dictionary, brisk means 'quick, energetic and active'. It must not be a stroll. THAT IS NOT EXERCISE! To be brisk, we should be able to sweat and feel our beloved heart beat fast; as fast as when a voluptious nude or a virile hunk appears in front of you. (Sorry, ladies. I do not really know how your heart would go under the circumstances. See, there is still so much to learn, so much to find out.)
Taking a simple one hour brisk walk merely costs you a pair of walking shoes. Almost anyone with some kind of problems on their mind or a heavy head or headache can find relief from such a brisk walk. According to researchers, endorphins, some kind of natural pain-killer from your own body will be released from the brain after more than half an hours brisk walking. See, it not only relaxes your body, improve your circulation, strenghten your legs, improve your lung capacity and raise your body's immunity; it drives out pain. How wonderful brisk walking is!
Of course, if you can more than walk, do even more. At the hill, I walk up the steep slopes and when there is a level stretch and I am alone, I run. I believe that is good for me. Anyway, I have not had a headache for so many years that I do not know since when. Furthermore, I treat my run as a stress test. Well, that is what the doctors get you to do on a treadmill; run at a certain speed until you feel unable to go on after just a short while. It implies that you are so short of breathe without sufficient oxygenated blood reaching the heart due to a clogged vein. Well, as I can run at a fair speed for more than fifteen minutes, I know I can pass the stress test and my blood vessels are clear.
However, I wish to caution those who have been couch-potatoes for some time. Whenever we start some kind of exercise, we have to go from slow to medium and then to fast. Increase the speed, distance or time gradually and you will learn to enjoy your health. It is best that we have a friend who is just as enthusistic at the start. Later, when you already know the benefits and the joy of exercise, you can go it alone.
At the beginning, sometimes, enthusiasm have to be curbed a little. I have known people who decided to start running for their health, to find a few days' aches and pain from too excessive a start a deterrent to further health improvement.
Go slow initially. A slow walk just to enjoy the outdoors, the early morning or late evening breeze at a suitable unpolluted place. Gradually, increase the speed of the walk. After a few weeks or a month, when your legs are much stronger, you can do a walk gradually breaking into a short slow run. After that, you are the best judge of your own body. Just do what you like best and be aware of the improved feeling in your own body.
Love your body enough to have it at its best and it will love you by bringing so much benefits to you. Care for every part of it with sufficient nutrients, rest, sleep, cleanliness, oxygen and exercise to ensure that it is in tip-top condition always.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Giuliano Stroe: Unbelievable Super Strength and Agility.
In the internet, search for Giuliano Stroe and you can see him in action in a good number of websites as well as on You-Tube.
Giuliano Stroe, from Romania, is not just any five year old neighbourhood kid. No kidding. I do not know whether we can ever see a kid like him, ever.
For one thing, at the fantastic age of five, he had entered the Guiness Book of World Records after appearing on an Italian TV show doing some incredible hand-walking skills with a weight between his legs. His feat was the fastest ever ten metre handwalk.
He is not just too young for his feats! He is not just a body-builder with a muscle bound body. He is one well-trained gymnast too!
To show his gymnastics skills, he did the 'Crouching Tiger' wall flip, back flip-flak on a kitchen table, back somersault and stunts on a high bar.
He does weight-lifting too. However, from the way he jerks the weights upwards, they are obvously too heavy for him.
According to the father, Iulian Stroe, aged thirty-three, this fantastic little guy has been going to the gym with his father 'since he was born'.Then, at the age of two, he had been training in that gym in Italy. Imagine that! How could that little two year old be interested in weights and gymnastics then? It is just beyond me!
As a guy who had taken up weight-lifting and gymnastics during my younger days, I still remember the aches of the muscles after each weight-lifting session. To me, weight-lifting is not just an exercise; it is a discipline to go back there every alternate day for another day of sweat and ache. But then, as a teenager, I had the advantage of motivation; I was motivated by the need to improve my strength and health. Thus, I am puzzled how this two year old could be similarly motivated or inspired. Was it the father or the environment of the gym?
No matter how we look at it, this little boy certainly has shown great strength, endurance and discipline.
According to the father, there is no danger of harm to his son as he himself had been training all his life.
Hwoever, I beg to differ. Although the father had been training all his life, when did he start his training? If he had started as a teenager, he would have his skeletal structure already fairly well developed. There would not be the problem of tight well-developed muscles impeding the growth of the bones.
I have noticed at national level gymnastics competition where I can remember at least one sure prize-winning well-developed muscle-bound gymnast who won top prize all the way from Under-12 year level to Under 18 year level. Through the years we watched him sweep prize after prize. Right or wrong, one opinion all coaches were unanimous about: He was a little too short. And we believed the muscles bound his skeletal structure too much.
Of course, all I can offer is based on observation and opinions. Perhaps, some expert on growth and development of the human body could tell us what is correct.
For the sake of that fantastic little boy, I hope to be proved wrong. I wish him all the best.
Giuliano Stroe, from Romania, is not just any five year old neighbourhood kid. No kidding. I do not know whether we can ever see a kid like him, ever.
For one thing, at the fantastic age of five, he had entered the Guiness Book of World Records after appearing on an Italian TV show doing some incredible hand-walking skills with a weight between his legs. His feat was the fastest ever ten metre handwalk.
He is not just too young for his feats! He is not just a body-builder with a muscle bound body. He is one well-trained gymnast too!
To show his gymnastics skills, he did the 'Crouching Tiger' wall flip, back flip-flak on a kitchen table, back somersault and stunts on a high bar.
He does weight-lifting too. However, from the way he jerks the weights upwards, they are obvously too heavy for him.
According to the father, Iulian Stroe, aged thirty-three, this fantastic little guy has been going to the gym with his father 'since he was born'.Then, at the age of two, he had been training in that gym in Italy. Imagine that! How could that little two year old be interested in weights and gymnastics then? It is just beyond me!
As a guy who had taken up weight-lifting and gymnastics during my younger days, I still remember the aches of the muscles after each weight-lifting session. To me, weight-lifting is not just an exercise; it is a discipline to go back there every alternate day for another day of sweat and ache. But then, as a teenager, I had the advantage of motivation; I was motivated by the need to improve my strength and health. Thus, I am puzzled how this two year old could be similarly motivated or inspired. Was it the father or the environment of the gym?
No matter how we look at it, this little boy certainly has shown great strength, endurance and discipline.
According to the father, there is no danger of harm to his son as he himself had been training all his life.
Hwoever, I beg to differ. Although the father had been training all his life, when did he start his training? If he had started as a teenager, he would have his skeletal structure already fairly well developed. There would not be the problem of tight well-developed muscles impeding the growth of the bones.
I have noticed at national level gymnastics competition where I can remember at least one sure prize-winning well-developed muscle-bound gymnast who won top prize all the way from Under-12 year level to Under 18 year level. Through the years we watched him sweep prize after prize. Right or wrong, one opinion all coaches were unanimous about: He was a little too short. And we believed the muscles bound his skeletal structure too much.
Of course, all I can offer is based on observation and opinions. Perhaps, some expert on growth and development of the human body could tell us what is correct.
For the sake of that fantastic little boy, I hope to be proved wrong. I wish him all the best.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
An open mind is the way to universal truth.
Many people find it difficult to accept the knowledge that are not similar to theirs. This is especially true where religion is concerned.
Yet, if we were to allow ourselves to open up to the teachings of every religion in this world, there is actually no conflict of knowledge. That is a fact because all teachings are based on truth. The only difference is the road the followers follow, be it through one who found enlightenment, the various deities or God.
Buddhism teaches us wisdom and our nature, our thoughts and action towards responsible fulfillment and self improvement. Buddha never professed to be God.
The way I look at Buddha's teaching, it is that the life we have is the present. Live it right and well, and the next step must follow. The next step is the future. There is no need to think about it. Just as what is being baked will turn out to be a delicious cake in the few minutes in the future if we concentrate on putting in the right ingredients and kneading the dough well at the present moment.
Taoism is the belief in a universal life force. Thus every follower tries to harmonise himself/herself with the forces of nature. In Taoism, the deities are manifestations of this universal force. Taoism has a strong belief in spirits, some of them good while others are bad. Thus, to achieve harmony, there is the need to turn to the good deities for guidance to a good life as well as appease the bad spirits to avoid unnecessary conflict or problems from them.
That sounds very much like the society we live in. Sometimes we have to pay corrupt officials to avoid problems from them. For example, to obtain a citizenship, some people cannot get theirs approved despite the number of years they have tried and their proficiency in the national language language while people who know how to appease such officials get their approvals very quickly. Help also comes faster if you know the way to get things done, such as knowing the right people in authority.
Hinduism has no founder and it consist of many different religious groups that has evolved many, many years ago. This is the case because there are many deities in Hinduism, perhaps more than can be found in Taoism. Like Taoism, Hinduism has its belief in what is called eternal truth which is similar to Taoism's universal life force. The deities give their worshippers guidance through life with actions of the said deities.
For example, there was the victory of good over evil as celebrated in deepavali. According to Hinduism, the deities reincarnate from time to time to vanquish the forces of evil and bring order back into the world, just as Jesus said he would return from time to time to help the humans God created.
The two religions that are clear-cut about One God is Christianity and Islam. Actually, as far as my knowledge and understanding is concerned, both religions have the same origin. There is merely that little difference that Jesus was the son of God in Christianity while Jesus was believed to be the first while Muhammad is the last of the prophets in Islam. If we go into the teachings of both these religions, they teach us wisdom and our nature, rightful thoughts and actions towards responsible fulfillment and self improvement besides belief in One God.
It is unfortunate that the only two religions that teach us of the same One God have a number of its followers finding fault with each other, sometimes even derogatory towards each other's God, breathing venom on the other's God as though that other God is a different God.
The religions are good but some of the people in them think they are even holier than God. Therein lies the problem of this world. When Man craze for power and prestige, they even use God to serve their purpose.
Once I told a friend,"People who kill others in the name of God, are those who do not truly believe in God." Why? Firstly, do these people believe that God is all powerful. With such power, if God wants someone dead, there is no need for bloodshed; the person would just not wake up from his sleep and that's that." Then, what about God being compassionate. Since God is compassionate, should not there be a strong feeling of sympathy and sadness for the suffering or bad luck of others and a desire to help them to turn good if it is believed that there are bad. So, by taking God's will into their hands, are these people thinking that God should not be compassionate? Are they saying they are wiser than God?
To these people, I will say, "Trust me. There is no one greater, better or wiser than God."
It is time humans open up their minds and let religious truths of whatever religion they belong to find space in their minds.
Yet, if we were to allow ourselves to open up to the teachings of every religion in this world, there is actually no conflict of knowledge. That is a fact because all teachings are based on truth. The only difference is the road the followers follow, be it through one who found enlightenment, the various deities or God.
Buddhism teaches us wisdom and our nature, our thoughts and action towards responsible fulfillment and self improvement. Buddha never professed to be God.
The way I look at Buddha's teaching, it is that the life we have is the present. Live it right and well, and the next step must follow. The next step is the future. There is no need to think about it. Just as what is being baked will turn out to be a delicious cake in the few minutes in the future if we concentrate on putting in the right ingredients and kneading the dough well at the present moment.
Taoism is the belief in a universal life force. Thus every follower tries to harmonise himself/herself with the forces of nature. In Taoism, the deities are manifestations of this universal force. Taoism has a strong belief in spirits, some of them good while others are bad. Thus, to achieve harmony, there is the need to turn to the good deities for guidance to a good life as well as appease the bad spirits to avoid unnecessary conflict or problems from them.
That sounds very much like the society we live in. Sometimes we have to pay corrupt officials to avoid problems from them. For example, to obtain a citizenship, some people cannot get theirs approved despite the number of years they have tried and their proficiency in the national language language while people who know how to appease such officials get their approvals very quickly. Help also comes faster if you know the way to get things done, such as knowing the right people in authority.
Hinduism has no founder and it consist of many different religious groups that has evolved many, many years ago. This is the case because there are many deities in Hinduism, perhaps more than can be found in Taoism. Like Taoism, Hinduism has its belief in what is called eternal truth which is similar to Taoism's universal life force. The deities give their worshippers guidance through life with actions of the said deities.
For example, there was the victory of good over evil as celebrated in deepavali. According to Hinduism, the deities reincarnate from time to time to vanquish the forces of evil and bring order back into the world, just as Jesus said he would return from time to time to help the humans God created.
The two religions that are clear-cut about One God is Christianity and Islam. Actually, as far as my knowledge and understanding is concerned, both religions have the same origin. There is merely that little difference that Jesus was the son of God in Christianity while Jesus was believed to be the first while Muhammad is the last of the prophets in Islam. If we go into the teachings of both these religions, they teach us wisdom and our nature, rightful thoughts and actions towards responsible fulfillment and self improvement besides belief in One God.
It is unfortunate that the only two religions that teach us of the same One God have a number of its followers finding fault with each other, sometimes even derogatory towards each other's God, breathing venom on the other's God as though that other God is a different God.
The religions are good but some of the people in them think they are even holier than God. Therein lies the problem of this world. When Man craze for power and prestige, they even use God to serve their purpose.
Once I told a friend,"People who kill others in the name of God, are those who do not truly believe in God." Why? Firstly, do these people believe that God is all powerful. With such power, if God wants someone dead, there is no need for bloodshed; the person would just not wake up from his sleep and that's that." Then, what about God being compassionate. Since God is compassionate, should not there be a strong feeling of sympathy and sadness for the suffering or bad luck of others and a desire to help them to turn good if it is believed that there are bad. So, by taking God's will into their hands, are these people thinking that God should not be compassionate? Are they saying they are wiser than God?
To these people, I will say, "Trust me. There is no one greater, better or wiser than God."
It is time humans open up their minds and let religious truths of whatever religion they belong to find space in their minds.
Monday, October 26, 2009
For the sake of love, don't force it. Let it happen naturally.
Once a person wants someone to change, the change will happen. But it would not be the change the person wants. The intensity of the love will change and soon dilution occurs. Love gradually fades away.
This happens because the implication of requesting change is you are not pleased with the present person. You do not like a part of that person. So, there is doubt about your love. For, love is supposed to be blind.
A lover cannot be a disciplinarian. He cannot demand that the one he loves do such and such a thing even though it is for her own good; even if she realizes that he is doing it because he cares.
All those who have loved and lost must examine this important aspect of love, for success can only be achieved when there is no demand despite weaknesses seen. To love someone is to except the person as he or she is. When you except someone, then you have the belief you can put up with whatever minus points the person has. That is the only way to start a marriage.
Anyway, there is no such thing as a perfect person. That person does not exist! Only God is perfect.
So, we have to ask ourselves, do we love the person enough to overlook everything else? Can we love the person despite anything else?
If there is love, the person with the weaknesses will take the initiative to change on his/her own. That is done to make the other person happy; to improve oneself so as to be appreciated even more; to be loved even more.
Do you remember your first date? Do you remember how you take the trouble to brush your teeth thoroughly? You test your own breath by placing your hand in front of your mouth so that the air from your mouth can reach your nose and you know that your breath is not smelly.
Do you remember how you dressed to please? Do you remember how you smile as charmingly as possible? Do you remember how anxious you were to please that someone? All these because of love! Love will change us for the better.
So, no matter how much you love or care for someone, let change happen naturally. Don’t force it!
This happens because the implication of requesting change is you are not pleased with the present person. You do not like a part of that person. So, there is doubt about your love. For, love is supposed to be blind.
A lover cannot be a disciplinarian. He cannot demand that the one he loves do such and such a thing even though it is for her own good; even if she realizes that he is doing it because he cares.
All those who have loved and lost must examine this important aspect of love, for success can only be achieved when there is no demand despite weaknesses seen. To love someone is to except the person as he or she is. When you except someone, then you have the belief you can put up with whatever minus points the person has. That is the only way to start a marriage.
Anyway, there is no such thing as a perfect person. That person does not exist! Only God is perfect.
So, we have to ask ourselves, do we love the person enough to overlook everything else? Can we love the person despite anything else?
If there is love, the person with the weaknesses will take the initiative to change on his/her own. That is done to make the other person happy; to improve oneself so as to be appreciated even more; to be loved even more.
Do you remember your first date? Do you remember how you take the trouble to brush your teeth thoroughly? You test your own breath by placing your hand in front of your mouth so that the air from your mouth can reach your nose and you know that your breath is not smelly.
Do you remember how you dressed to please? Do you remember how you smile as charmingly as possible? Do you remember how anxious you were to please that someone? All these because of love! Love will change us for the better.
So, no matter how much you love or care for someone, let change happen naturally. Don’t force it!
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Law Chu Hian- On positive attitudes acquired from cancer.
The writer with Law Chu Hian on the right
Below is Law Chu Hian in action.
At the Art of Living Centre in Sungai Petani, about two hundred and fifty people came to listen to a man who was full of humour and positive vibes. With his wit, he entertained the audience for an hour, possibly one and a half, with his talk of positive attitudes acquired through getting cancer.
The man was none other than the retired well-known popular TV7 Mandarin news reader, Law Chu Hian, aged 45 who found himself a cancer patient five years ago. Since his recovery, he had lived his life to the full. According to him, should he die after having utilised his time to the full, he will have no regrets.
One of the things he said was about making sure that the body can be helped to stay healthy by not getting angry. Anger only hurts the one who is angry. When you are angry, toxins will be sent forth from your own body.
One of his ways to be positive and happy was similar to the teaching of the Art of Living: Live for the present moment. Enjoy and be happy with whatever the present moment presents. "The present moment is a present for you," he said. And that carries a lot of truth. Be grateful that you are alive and able to enjoy the present moment. That is a lot to be thankful for. Many people live in the past, constanting bringing back unnecessary pain and unhappiness experienced; while some lived for the future, dreaming of what is yet to come, nothing possibly concrete; when everyone should be living in the present, doing the things to be done now, planning what is feasible.
He also joked and talked of gratitude. He told us that we should be grateful for all the things we have. Be grateful for whatever we have. Do not envy people who have big cars. If you have an old car, be grateful that it could take you wherever you want to go. If you have a motorcycle, be grateful that you do not have to walk to your destination. If you have no vehicle, be grateful that you have legs that can take you around, and perhaps be grateful to take a ride in a bus with a driver to take you some place.
When a person had cancer and recovers, he knows that he has been given a second chance in life. Everything is so very precious. Be grateful to the people closest to you, your wife or husband, your children and your relatives. Communicate with them. Do not say you do not have the time to sit down and communicate with them.
Another point he made was, 'Accept situations as they are. For some people, have wife/husband, also bad. No wife/husband, also bad.' It ought to be 'Have wife/husband, that's good. No wife/husband, that's also good. Be happy with whatever you have.
He also talked on stress. He joked about a chap in a queeue at the post office who was so stressed while waiting for his turn. He told us about the complains of a wife made at a Valentine's dinner which he attended although he is a bachelor. He told us that the next year found the man at the valentine dinner with another girl. So, do not complain. Appreciate the fact that someone loves you and is romantic enough to take you to the dinner.
And at home, appreciate whatever is done, for someone had put in time and effort to make your house a home.
(Blogger's note: Mr. Law Chu Hian spoke in Mandarin, a language this blogger did not learn in school. My Mandarin Language proficiency is only 1.8 out of a hundred. Thus, it is shamefully low. Through the help of an interpreter friend at the talk and my low language proficiency, the above is what I gathered from the talk. Any mistake in the material is due to my weakness. A thousand apologies to all of you.)
What you think affects you and your mind.
Just about an hour ago, I was called to witness once again the power of belief . My neighbor saw me and she told me about her experience in Australia where she went to some months ago to visit one of her children.
This neighbour, together with her husband, was once a Buddhist. Christianity was a religion she did not want to enter into then until her sons persuaded her to go to church.
Attending church lead her nowhere nearer to belief until one day she visited her daughter in another town in Malaysia. While she was there, her daughter took her to a church gathering where a pastor well-known for faith-healing was making an appearance. She told me that was the eye-opening event for her. She saw the blind recover their sight. She saw the crippled walk. She saw a lady feeling her neck so happily as she found the fat lump (Was it goitre which is the increase in size of the neck due to the thyroid gland?)in her throat gone. All those things happened right in front of her eyes. For her, it was the revelation of God's power to cure. It brought the inevitable belief in Jesus and christianity.
She became a Christian. Although her husband followed suit, till this day he is an unbeliever. In many ways, he is still a Buddhist.
Well, this lady told me of her experience in Australia. She occupied a room with two other members of the son's family. She found sleep difficult during the first few nights. There was this pounding sound of some kind of machinery somewhere, as if some workmen were working with the machinery at a development project. Anyway, that was how she described it. The sound kept her awake most of those nights.
After the first two nights, she was curious about the sound. So, she took a walk aound the neighbourhood in the daytime. She looked around but there was no place where a building project could be in progress. That night she asked one of the grandchildren occupying the same room whether they heard any such sound. What shocked her was the reply. They heard no such disturbing sound in the night. Not even in the day-time.
That night, when she heard the sound again, she took out her bible and read a part of it. Then, according to her, the pounding sound stopped. Since then, for the rest of her stay there, she heard no such sound and she could sleep very soundly.
Like many of you, I sometimes do wonder about this. But, I have long ago realised that such things as belief overcoming such problems can and do happen. (Read about my hearing of voices and my nipple being pinched in the middle of the night during the weekends when I was alone in a rented house.)I have learnt to accept it, unless there is some concrete proof that it cannot be.
Belief is a wonderful thing. It has helped many in times of touble. Of course, it could go the other way and cause restless sleep when the belief is negative. What we think affects our mind and whether you believe it or not, that is true. Your own experiences should tell you that.
This neighbour, together with her husband, was once a Buddhist. Christianity was a religion she did not want to enter into then until her sons persuaded her to go to church.
Attending church lead her nowhere nearer to belief until one day she visited her daughter in another town in Malaysia. While she was there, her daughter took her to a church gathering where a pastor well-known for faith-healing was making an appearance. She told me that was the eye-opening event for her. She saw the blind recover their sight. She saw the crippled walk. She saw a lady feeling her neck so happily as she found the fat lump (Was it goitre which is the increase in size of the neck due to the thyroid gland?)in her throat gone. All those things happened right in front of her eyes. For her, it was the revelation of God's power to cure. It brought the inevitable belief in Jesus and christianity.
She became a Christian. Although her husband followed suit, till this day he is an unbeliever. In many ways, he is still a Buddhist.
Well, this lady told me of her experience in Australia. She occupied a room with two other members of the son's family. She found sleep difficult during the first few nights. There was this pounding sound of some kind of machinery somewhere, as if some workmen were working with the machinery at a development project. Anyway, that was how she described it. The sound kept her awake most of those nights.
After the first two nights, she was curious about the sound. So, she took a walk aound the neighbourhood in the daytime. She looked around but there was no place where a building project could be in progress. That night she asked one of the grandchildren occupying the same room whether they heard any such sound. What shocked her was the reply. They heard no such disturbing sound in the night. Not even in the day-time.
That night, when she heard the sound again, she took out her bible and read a part of it. Then, according to her, the pounding sound stopped. Since then, for the rest of her stay there, she heard no such sound and she could sleep very soundly.
Like many of you, I sometimes do wonder about this. But, I have long ago realised that such things as belief overcoming such problems can and do happen. (Read about my hearing of voices and my nipple being pinched in the middle of the night during the weekends when I was alone in a rented house.)I have learnt to accept it, unless there is some concrete proof that it cannot be.
Belief is a wonderful thing. It has helped many in times of touble. Of course, it could go the other way and cause restless sleep when the belief is negative. What we think affects our mind and whether you believe it or not, that is true. Your own experiences should tell you that.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Gather knowledge for the prevention of cancer.
Last Saturday, I visit a lady who was down with cancer. Since the knowledge of how cancer can take away one of our friends came into my awareness, and that was even earlier than this particular lady's case, I had been restless. I have talked to a number of people who had suffered from cancer.
Some of them have survived more than five years, the period which is considered long enough to be considered a survivor. From my talk with these people, I realised that food and the degree of stress play important roles in helping these survivors.
Of course, there are the usual preventive measures such as smoking, alcohol and toxic substances.
Firstly, I must stress that I am writing this without personal experience as I have never had cancer. Besides, I am not a doctor. So, whatever is written here can only be considered experiences and opinions of friends who had suffered from cancer.
So far, every survivor that I have met agreed that organic food is important. According to them, many have turned vegetarian although a few have not. Looks like food such as vegetables and fruits, especially when eaten raw or as salads, are helpful in their recovery.
Another factor in food is the way it is cooked. Most agree that they stayed away from deep-fried food, especially if it comes from commercial places where the oil is used and reused.
Another thing to consider not having is fried food where very strong heat is used. One particular person told me she used to take such a type of fried mee, the more well-fried the better, from a stall. She believed it could have brought about her cancer. When I think of that, I asked about barbecued meats. Nobody seem to have taken that frequently enough to give an answer to that. However, I believe it could be carcinogenic.
This is the tall, thin bottle of flax seed oil which is high in lignans. It is supposed to be the richest vegetarian source of essential fatty acids. Omega-3 is the nutrient required by every cell in the body. (However, Omega-3 from fish oil is much better than the Omega-3 from flax seed oil.) Lignans are phytonutrients and act as antioxidants. The lignans are supposed to reduce the risk of certain cancers.
These are the flax seeds. To get at the oil in flax seeds, our teeth must crush every single one of them. We can also pound them into powder first before consuming them.
According to one of the survivors, a friend went for surgery, did not go for chemotheraphy but survived by munching and eating flaxseeds. She herself did that. In fact, she introduced me to the flaxseed. I also take the flaxseed oil although there is unconfirmed contraindication on it in articles on flaxseed oil in the internet.
Stress is another factor not to be taken lightly. I saw a teacher who took a year's leave to recover from her cancer. To help her overcome her stress, she went for the basic course in the Art of Living, took up Chi-Qong, took up gardening and planted organic vegetables and herbs and went for walks in the morning. Today, if you see her, you would not believe she had cancer. So were some of the other people.
One thing cancer did to these people, they value life, their family and their loved ones more. They learned a lot about cancer and know that the enemy is always ready to return once you let down your defences.
It has happened and if you look around long enough, you find those who become overconfident and careless enough to find the old enemy gloating truimphantly at them. Beware, for this is a terrible foe.
Although I do not have sufficient knowledge on the matter, I am writing on it in the hope that more people are aware of the possibility of facing such a foe. Prevention, as they rightly say, is better than any cure.
As a man, I have long realised the possibility of getting postate cancer one day if I live long enough. I have started my search for all possible knowledge on this enemy. To be armed, ready for it, is better than to be caught unawares. I have read a lot on it but am still looking into some details. All of us can do the same. Some of you may be living in the area of doctors who have claimed to have cured cancer and, perhaps, have come into contact with some of their patients. Information gathered could one day serve as the much needed defence against cancer.
Let us fight this common enemy together.
Some of them have survived more than five years, the period which is considered long enough to be considered a survivor. From my talk with these people, I realised that food and the degree of stress play important roles in helping these survivors.
Of course, there are the usual preventive measures such as smoking, alcohol and toxic substances.
Firstly, I must stress that I am writing this without personal experience as I have never had cancer. Besides, I am not a doctor. So, whatever is written here can only be considered experiences and opinions of friends who had suffered from cancer.
So far, every survivor that I have met agreed that organic food is important. According to them, many have turned vegetarian although a few have not. Looks like food such as vegetables and fruits, especially when eaten raw or as salads, are helpful in their recovery.
Another factor in food is the way it is cooked. Most agree that they stayed away from deep-fried food, especially if it comes from commercial places where the oil is used and reused.
Another thing to consider not having is fried food where very strong heat is used. One particular person told me she used to take such a type of fried mee, the more well-fried the better, from a stall. She believed it could have brought about her cancer. When I think of that, I asked about barbecued meats. Nobody seem to have taken that frequently enough to give an answer to that. However, I believe it could be carcinogenic.
This is the tall, thin bottle of flax seed oil which is high in lignans. It is supposed to be the richest vegetarian source of essential fatty acids. Omega-3 is the nutrient required by every cell in the body. (However, Omega-3 from fish oil is much better than the Omega-3 from flax seed oil.) Lignans are phytonutrients and act as antioxidants. The lignans are supposed to reduce the risk of certain cancers.
These are the flax seeds. To get at the oil in flax seeds, our teeth must crush every single one of them. We can also pound them into powder first before consuming them.
According to one of the survivors, a friend went for surgery, did not go for chemotheraphy but survived by munching and eating flaxseeds. She herself did that. In fact, she introduced me to the flaxseed. I also take the flaxseed oil although there is unconfirmed contraindication on it in articles on flaxseed oil in the internet.
Stress is another factor not to be taken lightly. I saw a teacher who took a year's leave to recover from her cancer. To help her overcome her stress, she went for the basic course in the Art of Living, took up Chi-Qong, took up gardening and planted organic vegetables and herbs and went for walks in the morning. Today, if you see her, you would not believe she had cancer. So were some of the other people.
One thing cancer did to these people, they value life, their family and their loved ones more. They learned a lot about cancer and know that the enemy is always ready to return once you let down your defences.
It has happened and if you look around long enough, you find those who become overconfident and careless enough to find the old enemy gloating truimphantly at them. Beware, for this is a terrible foe.
Although I do not have sufficient knowledge on the matter, I am writing on it in the hope that more people are aware of the possibility of facing such a foe. Prevention, as they rightly say, is better than any cure.
As a man, I have long realised the possibility of getting postate cancer one day if I live long enough. I have started my search for all possible knowledge on this enemy. To be armed, ready for it, is better than to be caught unawares. I have read a lot on it but am still looking into some details. All of us can do the same. Some of you may be living in the area of doctors who have claimed to have cured cancer and, perhaps, have come into contact with some of their patients. Information gathered could one day serve as the much needed defence against cancer.
Let us fight this common enemy together.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
God, religion and preachers.
The lady neighbour living behind my house saw me this afternoon and called out my name, "Ai Wei, come over here, please."
Thinking that she needed some kind of help, I quickly move to the rear portion of my garden. She beamed me a smile before telling me that I was invited to attend her church next Saturday evening at seven.
Unlike some preachers who would condemn people to eternal damnation if they fail to believe Jesus, the lord, this friendly neighbour is one of God's best disciple. She does not drive you off with ungodly words. She spreads the word of the lord with patience and goodness. She tells of God's miracles and salvation.
Yes, salvation! That is the word God would have his people convey and not damnation. Do some preachers ever stop to think of the implication of damnation? What is damnation? It is to send people to hell. Who would want to sent someone to hell? The answer ought to be: Someone I hate. Right? Loving us, would God want that? Certainly not! God is love. In Christianity, it is proclaimed that God loves us enough to send his own Son to suffer crucifixion for the sins of Man. He did it out of love, not hate. So, if the spirit have not touched the heart of a person and he truthfully could not find it in himself to believe, God would wait patiently for that son. I believe God has the patience to save our souls. He would never vent his wrath with condemnatory speech.
Let me tell you that this writer has been to church many times. When I was a young teacher in the town of Alor Star, i attended the Baptist church. The pastor then was Brother Love. How well his name suited him. He was always smiling and ever so good to everyone, Christian or otherwise. His love for mankind was godly. I can still visualise his perpetually smiling, ruddy face.
Among the few pastors I have known, this was a man of God. Never did I hear an unkind word. He only talks of salvation and the beautiful work of God. Tiredlessly, he went about his work for God. Although I did not become a Christian, it was through no fault of his. The fault must have been mine. Despite my admiration and love for this pastor, i just could not find that something.....
Perhaps, due to curiosity and my study of the other religions I discover and understand that God in His wisdom gives us choices, the roads to reach him are many and so are the ways to answer our prayers. Believe it, no matter where you are, whatever religion you belong to, God works in mysterious ways and He will be there.
Back to Brother Love. This was a man who got me to eagerly attend church, to enjoy the beautiful hymns such as 'Amazing Grace'. Not only that, it was a time when I studied the bible and went to the pulpit to talk on something in the bible. No other pastor has ever got me to do that.
I believe if more pastors are like Brother Love, more lost sheep would be found. Of course, there will still be a few stubborn sheep who would wander far afield.
In contrast to Brother Love and my friendly neighbour was another pastor who, in his sermon, told the people present in his church that a certain well-known man was condemned forever to hell despite his great wealth because he did not become a Christian. That well-known man was long dead, unable to defend himself and his own belief. When I heard that, my distaste for such damnation left me certain of never ever listening to another of his sermon.
How can anyone give such a sermon if he understands God; that everyone who has not yet found his way to God is a lost sheep. Did this pastor search for his lost sheep? Did he continue to assist the lost soul by praying for its safe journey home? Would not shouting and condemning drive away the children of God?
Why do these faults of mortal man surface so frequently as he stands as the representative of God? I believe we have to return to God, to the words of our loving God. Follow the example of Brother Love and success in bringing the sheep home can be achieved.
Although this post is on one particular religion, what is written applies to all religions. Those who wish to represent God must be almost; I accept that they are human after all; godly.
Thinking that she needed some kind of help, I quickly move to the rear portion of my garden. She beamed me a smile before telling me that I was invited to attend her church next Saturday evening at seven.
Unlike some preachers who would condemn people to eternal damnation if they fail to believe Jesus, the lord, this friendly neighbour is one of God's best disciple. She does not drive you off with ungodly words. She spreads the word of the lord with patience and goodness. She tells of God's miracles and salvation.
Yes, salvation! That is the word God would have his people convey and not damnation. Do some preachers ever stop to think of the implication of damnation? What is damnation? It is to send people to hell. Who would want to sent someone to hell? The answer ought to be: Someone I hate. Right? Loving us, would God want that? Certainly not! God is love. In Christianity, it is proclaimed that God loves us enough to send his own Son to suffer crucifixion for the sins of Man. He did it out of love, not hate. So, if the spirit have not touched the heart of a person and he truthfully could not find it in himself to believe, God would wait patiently for that son. I believe God has the patience to save our souls. He would never vent his wrath with condemnatory speech.
Let me tell you that this writer has been to church many times. When I was a young teacher in the town of Alor Star, i attended the Baptist church. The pastor then was Brother Love. How well his name suited him. He was always smiling and ever so good to everyone, Christian or otherwise. His love for mankind was godly. I can still visualise his perpetually smiling, ruddy face.
Among the few pastors I have known, this was a man of God. Never did I hear an unkind word. He only talks of salvation and the beautiful work of God. Tiredlessly, he went about his work for God. Although I did not become a Christian, it was through no fault of his. The fault must have been mine. Despite my admiration and love for this pastor, i just could not find that something.....
Perhaps, due to curiosity and my study of the other religions I discover and understand that God in His wisdom gives us choices, the roads to reach him are many and so are the ways to answer our prayers. Believe it, no matter where you are, whatever religion you belong to, God works in mysterious ways and He will be there.
Back to Brother Love. This was a man who got me to eagerly attend church, to enjoy the beautiful hymns such as 'Amazing Grace'. Not only that, it was a time when I studied the bible and went to the pulpit to talk on something in the bible. No other pastor has ever got me to do that.
I believe if more pastors are like Brother Love, more lost sheep would be found. Of course, there will still be a few stubborn sheep who would wander far afield.
In contrast to Brother Love and my friendly neighbour was another pastor who, in his sermon, told the people present in his church that a certain well-known man was condemned forever to hell despite his great wealth because he did not become a Christian. That well-known man was long dead, unable to defend himself and his own belief. When I heard that, my distaste for such damnation left me certain of never ever listening to another of his sermon.
How can anyone give such a sermon if he understands God; that everyone who has not yet found his way to God is a lost sheep. Did this pastor search for his lost sheep? Did he continue to assist the lost soul by praying for its safe journey home? Would not shouting and condemning drive away the children of God?
Why do these faults of mortal man surface so frequently as he stands as the representative of God? I believe we have to return to God, to the words of our loving God. Follow the example of Brother Love and success in bringing the sheep home can be achieved.
Although this post is on one particular religion, what is written applies to all religions. Those who wish to represent God must be almost; I accept that they are human after all; godly.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
What to use and what to love.
Below is a story which I have posted in this blog before. However, here it is again as I find that this new way of looking at the story is eye-opening and helps us to become better individuals. Well, read and find out for yourself if what I have said is true.
While a man was polishing his new car,
his 4 yr old son picked up a stone
and scratched lines on the side of the car.
In anger, the man took the child's hand
and hit it many times not realizing that
he was using a wrench.
At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers
due to multiple fractures.
When the child saw his father.....
with painful eyes he asked, 'Dad, when will my fingers grow back?'
The man was so hurt and speechless;
he went back to his car and kicked it a lot of times.
Devastated by his own actions......
sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches;
the child had written 'LOVE YOU DAD'.
The next day that man committed suicide. . .
Anger and Love have no limits;
choose the latter to have a beautiful, lovely
life and remember this:
Things are to be used and people are to be loved.
Sometimes, the problem in today's world is
that people are used while things are loved.
Let's try always to keep this thought in mind:
Things are to be used,
People are to be loved and
Not the other way around.
Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character;
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
I'm glad a friend forwarded this to me as a reminder..
I hope you have a good day no matter what problems you may face
it's the only day you'll have before it's over.
While a man was polishing his new car,
his 4 yr old son picked up a stone
and scratched lines on the side of the car.
In anger, the man took the child's hand
and hit it many times not realizing that
he was using a wrench.
At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers
due to multiple fractures.
When the child saw his father.....
with painful eyes he asked, 'Dad, when will my fingers grow back?'
The man was so hurt and speechless;
he went back to his car and kicked it a lot of times.
Devastated by his own actions......
sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches;
the child had written 'LOVE YOU DAD'.
The next day that man committed suicide. . .
Anger and Love have no limits;
choose the latter to have a beautiful, lovely
life and remember this:
Things are to be used and people are to be loved.
Sometimes, the problem in today's world is
that people are used while things are loved.
Let's try always to keep this thought in mind:
Things are to be used,
People are to be loved and
Not the other way around.
Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character;
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
I'm glad a friend forwarded this to me as a reminder..
I hope you have a good day no matter what problems you may face
it's the only day you'll have before it's over.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Will-power makes the difference.
I once conducted an experiment with a kerosene lamp fitted with a glass funnel to protect the flame as well as to lead the smoke upwards out of it. After some hours, there was this very thin layer of soot on the inner surface of the glass funnel.
That thin layer of nicotine stain is also in the throat of the smokers. That is the reason smokers cough a lot in the morning; the vain attempt to get rid of the nicotine stain which is the foreign matter in their throat.
Many of my students know it. So do many smokers. Many smokers know they ought not to smoke. They know and understand that smoke will pollute their body with undesirable chemicals and smoke. Just as smoke will leave a thin stain on the fingernails and teeth, it will also stain the walls of their airway and the lungs. They have the knowledge. They know the smoke is dangerous to themselves and their loved ones who are often near enough to take in the secondary smoke. Yet, they continue with the dangerous habit. Why? It has to be a lack of will-power.
There are, in fact, many things in life we know ought not to be done by us. Yet, we do it. Why? The problem lies in the lack of will-power. There are also many things which we should do. For example, we know we have to inculcate some discipline into our children. We have to find the time to explain to the children the reason certain things need to be done or not done, how it is done correctly and encourage them to do it with praise to have them repeat the deed and cultivate a good habit. Yet, there are those parents who do not do it. The excuse has always been, ”I do not have the time. I am too tired after work. They are still too young to understand.” Are those excuses valid? If we do not teach them when they are still young, then, when are we going to teach them? Are we going to take action only when things get out of hand and unmanageable? That would be too late.
There were times when I heard relatives give good advice to such parents, but they still do nothing. There is no will. When there is no will, there can be no way it can be done.
Another indication of a lack of will is the delaying tactics of some people. It’s always: “Never mind. I’ll do it another day. Another day follows another day and still, it is too early to start on it.
What is the difference between a successful businessman and an unsuccessful one, a hardworking person and a lazy guy or a good parent and a slip-shod one? Have you ever thought of it?
Let’s take business. You gather knowledge on the particular type of business, know how to go about it and the amount of money or finance required as well as the best place to operate it. The time is right. So, you have the knowledge. You have the money or the financial backing. What else do you need? All you need next is to do it. Move. Put your plans into action. You have planned the work. The will to work the plan must be the follow through. Without the will to do so would leave it forever merely a plan. How much will you put into the work is the next important factor. A half-hearted effort produce a fifty percent success. Nothing less than a hundred percent is the effort required to succeed.
In Penang, In my thirties, I met a fish-breeder in Air Itam. It was a time when I wanted to make sure I would be a successful discus breeder. I have always believed that, to be the best, learn from the best available.
He told me how he learned all he could about the fish, bought ten of them (They were very expensive then.) and stayed with his fish day and night, caring for his fish with hundred percent attention till they paired off and started breeding. When he was successful at breeding, he exported his more beautiful fish. If my memory serves me well, he was even mentioned in one of the discus books written by one famous writer on this fish.
So, the will to carry out what had been planned with a hundred percent effort is the way to success. Students, inventors and people from all walks of life will always find this to be true.
That thin layer of nicotine stain is also in the throat of the smokers. That is the reason smokers cough a lot in the morning; the vain attempt to get rid of the nicotine stain which is the foreign matter in their throat.
Many of my students know it. So do many smokers. Many smokers know they ought not to smoke. They know and understand that smoke will pollute their body with undesirable chemicals and smoke. Just as smoke will leave a thin stain on the fingernails and teeth, it will also stain the walls of their airway and the lungs. They have the knowledge. They know the smoke is dangerous to themselves and their loved ones who are often near enough to take in the secondary smoke. Yet, they continue with the dangerous habit. Why? It has to be a lack of will-power.
There are, in fact, many things in life we know ought not to be done by us. Yet, we do it. Why? The problem lies in the lack of will-power. There are also many things which we should do. For example, we know we have to inculcate some discipline into our children. We have to find the time to explain to the children the reason certain things need to be done or not done, how it is done correctly and encourage them to do it with praise to have them repeat the deed and cultivate a good habit. Yet, there are those parents who do not do it. The excuse has always been, ”I do not have the time. I am too tired after work. They are still too young to understand.” Are those excuses valid? If we do not teach them when they are still young, then, when are we going to teach them? Are we going to take action only when things get out of hand and unmanageable? That would be too late.
There were times when I heard relatives give good advice to such parents, but they still do nothing. There is no will. When there is no will, there can be no way it can be done.
Another indication of a lack of will is the delaying tactics of some people. It’s always: “Never mind. I’ll do it another day. Another day follows another day and still, it is too early to start on it.
What is the difference between a successful businessman and an unsuccessful one, a hardworking person and a lazy guy or a good parent and a slip-shod one? Have you ever thought of it?
Let’s take business. You gather knowledge on the particular type of business, know how to go about it and the amount of money or finance required as well as the best place to operate it. The time is right. So, you have the knowledge. You have the money or the financial backing. What else do you need? All you need next is to do it. Move. Put your plans into action. You have planned the work. The will to work the plan must be the follow through. Without the will to do so would leave it forever merely a plan. How much will you put into the work is the next important factor. A half-hearted effort produce a fifty percent success. Nothing less than a hundred percent is the effort required to succeed.
In Penang, In my thirties, I met a fish-breeder in Air Itam. It was a time when I wanted to make sure I would be a successful discus breeder. I have always believed that, to be the best, learn from the best available.
He told me how he learned all he could about the fish, bought ten of them (They were very expensive then.) and stayed with his fish day and night, caring for his fish with hundred percent attention till they paired off and started breeding. When he was successful at breeding, he exported his more beautiful fish. If my memory serves me well, he was even mentioned in one of the discus books written by one famous writer on this fish.
So, the will to carry out what had been planned with a hundred percent effort is the way to success. Students, inventors and people from all walks of life will always find this to be true.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
The Return of the Nine Emperor Deities bringing protection and salvation to mankind.
Here is the newly selected trustee. 
The trustee at the head of the procession to the river.The procession begins.
At the river, the deities are invited into the bodies of the humans. However, with too many people crowding around, that could not be seen. Possibly, the atmsophere is recorded as people moves away from the river with the arrival of each deity.
The deities move to the chariots to return to the temple.
Here's one of the Nine Emperor Deities walking and dancing to the temple through the streets in the darkness of the night.
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The Nine Emperor Deities Festival which starts on Sunday, the 18th of October, 2009 is a Taoist festival which celebrates the return of the Nine Emperor Deities from heaven to earth. These Nine Emperor Deities or Kew Ong Yah(九皇爺) are worshiped as one deity known as 'Thien Hou', the Taoist goddess of the sea and queen of heaven who represents health, wealth and prosperity. The festival is celebrated for nine days, from the first day to the ninth day of the ninth moon in the Chinese lunar calendar.
Starting from the evening of the eve of the first day of the ninth moon, Devotees gather at 'Kew Ong Yah temples everywhere for the festival. These nine deities are believed to dwell in the stars in the Northern Heaven.Each year, they are requested to return to give salvation and protection to mankind.
About a week before the eve of the Chinese Ninth Lunar, each Nine Emperor Deities' temple would choose a trustee, usually a wealthy businessperson, would be chosen from among a good number of applicants for the post, to manage the festival.
So, on the eve of the Chinese ninth moon, the Nine Emperor Deities' temples hold a ceremony to welcome the return of the Nine Emperor Deities. Since these deities' passage from heaven to earth is through the waterways, a place at a river or the sea would be selected to welcome them. Sometimes symbolic lions, with lion dancers as well as drums and cymbals are used to welcome them. In the evening, devotees holding joss-sticks would follow a procession to the river to welcome the spirits. The spirits would enter the bodies of humans who had gone through a cleansing of the body. These humans would go into a trance. Later in the night, the devotees would accompany the Nine Emperor Deities back to the temple.
For the next nine days, the Nine Emperor Deities would go through the business centres or areas to bring luck, prosperity and protection.
As we can see, as in all religions, spirits, deities and Gods bring peace of mind as well as a sense of security to all devotees. Through the divine spirit, Man has been able to face the unknown and all other challenges to stay secure in his faith in the divine.
What kind of an example are the parents?
Have you heard young children shout obscene words as though they were their usual everyday vocabulary?
Have you seen children throw tantrums or shout at their elders as though it is an everyday occurance?
Have you seen children riding motorcycles without licences or crash helmets?
Well, I have and they are never pretty sights. In them, I see rough, uncouth, non-law-abiding people who would most probably one day cause a lot of pain and misery in this world.
The sorry part of it all is that parents are usually the culprit in this sad development of human character. Look deeper a little and we find that it is the parents who practice or allow such behaviour to materialise.
If children use vulgar words from young, they most probably; I give a small percentage to outside influence; come from a home where such words are common place.
Disrespect could only come about when parents do not respect others or neglect their children and allow bad influence to seep in.
As for those children who constantly break traffic rules, I would fault the parents first. When asked how they could allow their children to go around on motorcycles without a protective crash-helmet or a riding licence, many claim the bikes were taken out without the parents' permission.
If the riding of a bike without the parents' permission is a true excuse, then those parents ought to make sure the key to the bike is not available to the children. There are ways to do it. Furthermore, are these parents saying that they could not discipline or control their children, that their children have got out of hand?
Let me tell you an occassion when a friend met me in front of a mechanic's shop and was telling me about his insurance and road-tax renewal. Along came another guy who knew this friend. Upon being told what my friend was doing there, the man told my friend there was no neccessity of getting an insurance. Why spend the money? According to the guy, he had been going around on his bike for more that eight years without an insurance or a road-tax. The unbelievable part was his imparting this knowledge with some pride. Imagine that! No road-tax for eight years and the SHORT ARM of the law was unable to reach him! Should he knock down and kill a child or somebody, would he not just escape in order to save his own skin instead of seeking help for the injured? And the injured could die without immediate medical treatment!
Just imagine what kind of a person would break the law and consider it nothing the risk of having no insurance. I would consider such a person irresponsible.
What kind of an example would such a parent be to his children? No wonder we have so many reckless 'Mat Rempits' or 'road-devils' committing all kinds of illegal acts on our roads, graduating slowly to crime. There would be injuries and deaths. And when these young people die, what is the cause? It is the negligent parents.
Yes, such negligent parents allow things to deteriorate and worsen to such a degree that the problem has become too much for them to handle. It most probably started as something small, a joy ride perhaps. Then, there is the dangerous parental pride upon seeing their young child's ability to handle a bike, even though awkwardly. Convenience could also be a factor; getting children to run errants like buying sundry goods from a nearby shop; fetching the purchase quickly on a motorbike. Indiscipline leads to giving in to demands. Soon, the use of the motorbike is an acceptable occurance.
Did these parents ever think of safety? Can young minds be matured enough not to allow the impulse to speed overcome them? I know of at least one case, my own class monitor, where death came due to such speeding as a way to show off.
I was sad when I heard how the driver of the lorry, he crashed into while trying to overtake it as an oncoming car was approaching, was so mad with his behaviour that he spit into the young boy's body. The right or wrong of such accidents is not for me to consider. I did not see it happen. I merely heard from other students.
Do we want children to die this way even before they had the chance to be matured enough to have some control over themselves? We, as parents, are responsible to bring them up correctly. It is the most important duty in the world.
Have you seen children throw tantrums or shout at their elders as though it is an everyday occurance?
Have you seen children riding motorcycles without licences or crash helmets?
Well, I have and they are never pretty sights. In them, I see rough, uncouth, non-law-abiding people who would most probably one day cause a lot of pain and misery in this world.
The sorry part of it all is that parents are usually the culprit in this sad development of human character. Look deeper a little and we find that it is the parents who practice or allow such behaviour to materialise.
If children use vulgar words from young, they most probably; I give a small percentage to outside influence; come from a home where such words are common place.
Disrespect could only come about when parents do not respect others or neglect their children and allow bad influence to seep in.
As for those children who constantly break traffic rules, I would fault the parents first. When asked how they could allow their children to go around on motorcycles without a protective crash-helmet or a riding licence, many claim the bikes were taken out without the parents' permission.
If the riding of a bike without the parents' permission is a true excuse, then those parents ought to make sure the key to the bike is not available to the children. There are ways to do it. Furthermore, are these parents saying that they could not discipline or control their children, that their children have got out of hand?
Let me tell you an occassion when a friend met me in front of a mechanic's shop and was telling me about his insurance and road-tax renewal. Along came another guy who knew this friend. Upon being told what my friend was doing there, the man told my friend there was no neccessity of getting an insurance. Why spend the money? According to the guy, he had been going around on his bike for more that eight years without an insurance or a road-tax. The unbelievable part was his imparting this knowledge with some pride. Imagine that! No road-tax for eight years and the SHORT ARM of the law was unable to reach him! Should he knock down and kill a child or somebody, would he not just escape in order to save his own skin instead of seeking help for the injured? And the injured could die without immediate medical treatment!
Just imagine what kind of a person would break the law and consider it nothing the risk of having no insurance. I would consider such a person irresponsible.
What kind of an example would such a parent be to his children? No wonder we have so many reckless 'Mat Rempits' or 'road-devils' committing all kinds of illegal acts on our roads, graduating slowly to crime. There would be injuries and deaths. And when these young people die, what is the cause? It is the negligent parents.
Yes, such negligent parents allow things to deteriorate and worsen to such a degree that the problem has become too much for them to handle. It most probably started as something small, a joy ride perhaps. Then, there is the dangerous parental pride upon seeing their young child's ability to handle a bike, even though awkwardly. Convenience could also be a factor; getting children to run errants like buying sundry goods from a nearby shop; fetching the purchase quickly on a motorbike. Indiscipline leads to giving in to demands. Soon, the use of the motorbike is an acceptable occurance.
Did these parents ever think of safety? Can young minds be matured enough not to allow the impulse to speed overcome them? I know of at least one case, my own class monitor, where death came due to such speeding as a way to show off.
I was sad when I heard how the driver of the lorry, he crashed into while trying to overtake it as an oncoming car was approaching, was so mad with his behaviour that he spit into the young boy's body. The right or wrong of such accidents is not for me to consider. I did not see it happen. I merely heard from other students.
Do we want children to die this way even before they had the chance to be matured enough to have some control over themselves? We, as parents, are responsible to bring them up correctly. It is the most important duty in the world.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Deepavali:Good triumphs over evil.
Last night, the sky was brightly lit up by the moon and the darkness of the night was decorated by the lights of firesorks. The sound of fireworks is the portend of another festive day for the country, Malaysia. And the festival that is celebrated today is Deepavali, the festival of lights; a celebration of the triumph of good over evil, the victory of light over darkness, celebrated by the Hindus and the Sikhs in Malaysia.
On Deepavali day our Hindu friends light oil lamps in their homes in the morning. By lighting the oil lamps, the Hindus thank their gods for the happiness, knowledge, peace and wealth that they have. The Hindus consider Deepavali as one of the most important festivals to celebrate.
There are a number of legends connected to Deepavali. We have the story of the demon, Narakasura who ruled the Kingdom of Pradyoshapuram. This demon brought a lot of hardship and cruelty to the people. When lord Krishna saw such wickedness, he killed the demon and the people celebrated the day with Deepavali.
According to another legend, it was Rama's victory over the demon king, Ravana, and his return after fourteen years of exile to be united with his wife, Sita. This was celebrated with a row of lamps; thus its name Dipawali.
Another legend has it that Deepavali marks the day when the proud and evil Mahishasura was destroyed at the hands of the goddess Kali.
So, as can be seen from the legends, no matter which prevails, Deepavali is the celebration of the removal of evil, of the victory of all things good.
As for me, a monotheist, I visited my Hindu friends to wish them a happy Deepavali, to make the occassion an even joyous one. It was a time to be united again as friends, a time to help each other rejoice in our relationship and to have them know that we can always be together during all times.
It was not so much the food but the company that make such visits memorable; the closeness, the respect for each other's religious belief and cultures, the understanding of other people's belief. All these things are important in our relationship with each other as fellow humans.
Of course, it is also the opportunity to enjoy the various types of food typically Deepavali.
May we always foster even greater understanding among ourselves to rid this world of religious and cultural disrespect. For, we all are created by the same God, no matter what name humans have given Him. As God is all powerful, and I expect everyone; except atheist, of course; to agree with me when I say that God is all powerful, then we ought to realise that He controls all things, not any power-crazy human.
Let us all think of God on this day.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Only belief can bring confidence.
The above are pictures of me on my motorbike during my younger days. In a previous post is a photograph of an older me.
And here I am with one of my favourite students who could speak English very well.
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Have you seen those advertisements in which they show a fat guy being transformed into a slim, muscled one with the stomach muscles clearly defined, chest muscles taut and hard, big strong shoulders and arms? Yes, we see them in advertisements which claim to give any obese person such a body within a certain period of time with either a slimming diet or some kind of device which is not supposed to develope muscles.
Whenever, I see such an advertisement, I always wonder how the owners of the advertisement could expect people to believe that they can achieve such a ridiculous result.
Come on! If the method used does not involve some kind of exercise which can build muscles, how do such muscles come about from someone who has always been obese? Do these advertisers mean to tell us that such well defined muscles are just below the fat of obese people?
I have been exercising almost all my life. In school, I have done cross-country running, 800 metres, round-the-house relays, gymnastics, football, rugby and tae-kwon-do but I have never had such beautiful stomach muscles as the ones advertised.
As a teacher, I have been a very active Kedah state gymnastic coach as well as a physical education teacher. Although I had no weight problem, I never had those prominent stomach muscles.
Today, in retirement, I walk briskly up a hill, run fast at level ground at the top and do all kinds of exercise as I descend every morning for a little more than an hour. Yes, I have a slim, enviable shape but no well-defined muscles, except perhaps the legs.
So, I was indeed truly surprised that people who go through such slimming therepy are able to achieve such fantastic results.
Others may believe it can happen. I don't know. I just cannot believe it. I mean, well-defined muscles only come people who carry weights, do daily tough manual tasks, practise high-wire circus acts and martial arts exponents who practise powerful moves daily. Certainly not merely through a simple no-sweat slimming therapy.
What I am saying is that such advertisements should make people believe the results are possible.
When we advertise, we are selling something. In order to sell, we must get the targeted customers to believe. If the pictures of the results, no matter how attractive they may be, are difficult to believe, can the results be good? Can it give the targeted group the confidence to believe in your product?
In life, every individual also sells himself/herself. What you says or claim must be believable. Do people believe in you? Do you give them the confidence to rely on you for certain results, to expect that you would deliver whatever you promise?
For example, if I claim to be an English Language teacher who can help your son improve his English Language proficiency but my speech or writing in the language is full of mistakes, would you believe me? Would you expect me with my my broken English to deliver the expected result?
Certainly not! You must be really naive, if you do.
If I claim I can walk briskly up a hill and run at certain parts of it but I am grossly overweight, would you believe me? Certainly not!
And getting people to believe in us is of utmost importance as people act just on belief, even though the belief can be wrong sometimes.
And belief in oneself is what brings us to the achievement we become capable of. It is through belief that confidence and courage takes us against any challenge that life throws at us.
Pride comes before a fall.
There was this young boy of twelve who made excellent progress in standard six despite a lack of time to study. He was offered a place in the best school in the country then, the Penang Free School.
He was fortunate that he had a keen interest in books at a very young age. With a great interest in health and other topics, he frequented the British Council Library in Bishop Street and the USIS Library in another street nearby. He read a lot, learned a lot and did very well in school.
He thought he was very clever as he could talk in excellent English. In fact, at the end of standard six, when pupils were divided into groups, he was selected to be the leader of one of the groups. He was so good at conversing in English that he astonished everyone with his ability to speak to British tourists whenever he had the opportunity to do so.
When someone is good at the medium of instruction in a school, he/she finds no difficulty in understanding the subjects taught. So, he did very well in every subject.
When he was sent to the Penang Free School, de developed a pride in himself. He believed in his own ability so much that he began to neglect the teaching of the teachers, spending more time in talking with fellow students. He became a chatterbox.
His school work became sloppy and he spent more time on comics. Although his results dropped in the first and second year, he was still not bothered as he still managed to pass in all of the subjects. And when it came to the English Language, he was still good.
It was only in form three that he realised he was slacking in his studies. It took the words of a caring teacher to awaken him.
The teacher gave him a lecture and ended it with,"If you talk less and pay more attention, you can be good at your studies. It's time you wake up and realise that you're throwing away a good future."
The truth of those words sank in and for the first time in many years, he realised that he had to change his ways. He was thankful to the teacher for the lecture he received.
Since that day, he went back to listening attentively to what was taught. He put in better, more conscientious work.
He was lucky as it got him better marks and results. Eventually, with the good results he got academically, he achieved his ambition to be a teacher, to help other students just as that and other teachers had helped him.
I know that to be true for I was that student.
Looking back, I believe I have done a good job. My English Language, English literature and Art and Craft students as well as my gymnasts would know what I had done for them.
Thank God, realisation came in the nick of time.
He was fortunate that he had a keen interest in books at a very young age. With a great interest in health and other topics, he frequented the British Council Library in Bishop Street and the USIS Library in another street nearby. He read a lot, learned a lot and did very well in school.
He thought he was very clever as he could talk in excellent English. In fact, at the end of standard six, when pupils were divided into groups, he was selected to be the leader of one of the groups. He was so good at conversing in English that he astonished everyone with his ability to speak to British tourists whenever he had the opportunity to do so.
When someone is good at the medium of instruction in a school, he/she finds no difficulty in understanding the subjects taught. So, he did very well in every subject.
When he was sent to the Penang Free School, de developed a pride in himself. He believed in his own ability so much that he began to neglect the teaching of the teachers, spending more time in talking with fellow students. He became a chatterbox.
His school work became sloppy and he spent more time on comics. Although his results dropped in the first and second year, he was still not bothered as he still managed to pass in all of the subjects. And when it came to the English Language, he was still good.
It was only in form three that he realised he was slacking in his studies. It took the words of a caring teacher to awaken him.
The teacher gave him a lecture and ended it with,"If you talk less and pay more attention, you can be good at your studies. It's time you wake up and realise that you're throwing away a good future."
The truth of those words sank in and for the first time in many years, he realised that he had to change his ways. He was thankful to the teacher for the lecture he received.
Since that day, he went back to listening attentively to what was taught. He put in better, more conscientious work.
He was lucky as it got him better marks and results. Eventually, with the good results he got academically, he achieved his ambition to be a teacher, to help other students just as that and other teachers had helped him.
I know that to be true for I was that student.
Looking back, I believe I have done a good job. My English Language, English literature and Art and Craft students as well as my gymnasts would know what I had done for them.
Thank God, realisation came in the nick of time.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Dianne Odell, thank you for your inspiration.
On the 13th of February 1947, in Tennessee, Dianne Odell was born. Unfortunately, she was struck by polio at the age of three. Worse, it was the most crippling type of polio, bulbo-spinal polio which not only paralysed her whole body, it caused a deformity in her spine.
There was a time, during the 1940s and 1950s when polio was common among children and there was no cure. So, children were then told not to drink water from suspicious sources such as public fountains, to avoid swimming pools and crowded places such as theatres.
However, it was discovered that children who played in polio-laden dirty places recovered from polio after what seemed like a bout of flu, apparently immune to the disease while children in clean places were more susceptible to polio.
There was a year when more than 50,000 cases were reported with more than three thousand dead due to paralysis of the respiratory muscles. Some twenty thousand cases resulted in cripples with nerves destroyed and muscles and bones affected.
Polio starts with some kind of fatigue, a stiff neck, headache, fever and weakened legs.
Fortunately for many, a vaccine for polio was available at the end of the 1950s.
For Dianne Odell, the vaccine came too late. So did a portable respiratory machine as she was unable to benefit from it due to her deformed spine. As a result, she had to spend fifty-eight years in a seven foot, seven hundred and fifty pound breathing machine. To this day, there are still people who use such a machine known as the iron lung. Till the age of twenty, she could still come out of that machine for a short while. In fact, she came out of it to have herself baptised at the age of thirteen. After the age of twenty, she had to be in her iron lung twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.
In spite of her polio, her having to live in a machine with a electric pump to regulate the pressure of her chest for the remainder of her life, till the age of sixty-one when an electrical blackout and an inability of the relatives to start a back-up generator took away her life, she showed other humans what could still be accomplished despite her handicap.
Despite her having to spend her life in the iron lung, she did complete her studies with the help of her classmates and teachers who brought assignments from school for her to answer, again with the help of friends and family members as well as a Dictaphone. Fantastic as it may sound, she wrote with her toes. Through such everyday heroes and her own determination, she graduated from her high school at the age of eighteen. She took courses at the University of Tennessee and studied psychology through long-distance classes from Freed-Hardeman University. However, she had to stop her study as she suffered from migraine headaches. Nevertheless, she was awarded an honorary degree.
To motivate children, especially those with disabilities, she wrote a book titled Blinky, Less Light which took her ten long years to write using a voice activated computer and sold almost one hundred thousand copies. Imagine that! Ten long years! What an effort! What determination! A lesser person would have given up in despair of ever completing it. How great her determination was can only be known when understand that the pace was slow and painful with hospital visits and surgeries she had to endure. And what an honourable goal! She did not stop there. She was even writing her own autobiography when the electrical blackout stopped her. For her, sixty-one years just was not enough! What a woman!
And we must not forget the wonderful people we have in this world. Her parents took it upon themselves to ensure that she would live and accomplish what she did. Her relatives, friends, students and teachers of her school as well as the contributors of donations for her welfare showed that there is a sea of people who care. These are people with hearts of gold who are given the opportunity to show themselves in such trying times.
Actually, amidst the turmoil and the savagery that greet us each day as we turn the pages of our newspapers, is a wonderful world filled with beautiful people.
Dianne Odell is certainly an inspiration to all who face challenges in their lives. Despite the odds against her, she went through life, improving herself in ways possible to her and emerged thankful of the love and goodness the people around her had bestowed by reaching out to give children the inspiration to improve themselves. She gave so much of herself despite coming into the world with so much less than the average child.
The world lost a truly beautiful woman on the 28th of May, 2008. Physically, she may be gone but she will always remain in our hearts.
There was a time, during the 1940s and 1950s when polio was common among children and there was no cure. So, children were then told not to drink water from suspicious sources such as public fountains, to avoid swimming pools and crowded places such as theatres.
However, it was discovered that children who played in polio-laden dirty places recovered from polio after what seemed like a bout of flu, apparently immune to the disease while children in clean places were more susceptible to polio.
There was a year when more than 50,000 cases were reported with more than three thousand dead due to paralysis of the respiratory muscles. Some twenty thousand cases resulted in cripples with nerves destroyed and muscles and bones affected.
Polio starts with some kind of fatigue, a stiff neck, headache, fever and weakened legs.
Fortunately for many, a vaccine for polio was available at the end of the 1950s.
For Dianne Odell, the vaccine came too late. So did a portable respiratory machine as she was unable to benefit from it due to her deformed spine. As a result, she had to spend fifty-eight years in a seven foot, seven hundred and fifty pound breathing machine. To this day, there are still people who use such a machine known as the iron lung. Till the age of twenty, she could still come out of that machine for a short while. In fact, she came out of it to have herself baptised at the age of thirteen. After the age of twenty, she had to be in her iron lung twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.
In spite of her polio, her having to live in a machine with a electric pump to regulate the pressure of her chest for the remainder of her life, till the age of sixty-one when an electrical blackout and an inability of the relatives to start a back-up generator took away her life, she showed other humans what could still be accomplished despite her handicap.
Despite her having to spend her life in the iron lung, she did complete her studies with the help of her classmates and teachers who brought assignments from school for her to answer, again with the help of friends and family members as well as a Dictaphone. Fantastic as it may sound, she wrote with her toes. Through such everyday heroes and her own determination, she graduated from her high school at the age of eighteen. She took courses at the University of Tennessee and studied psychology through long-distance classes from Freed-Hardeman University. However, she had to stop her study as she suffered from migraine headaches. Nevertheless, she was awarded an honorary degree.
To motivate children, especially those with disabilities, she wrote a book titled Blinky, Less Light which took her ten long years to write using a voice activated computer and sold almost one hundred thousand copies. Imagine that! Ten long years! What an effort! What determination! A lesser person would have given up in despair of ever completing it. How great her determination was can only be known when understand that the pace was slow and painful with hospital visits and surgeries she had to endure. And what an honourable goal! She did not stop there. She was even writing her own autobiography when the electrical blackout stopped her. For her, sixty-one years just was not enough! What a woman!
And we must not forget the wonderful people we have in this world. Her parents took it upon themselves to ensure that she would live and accomplish what she did. Her relatives, friends, students and teachers of her school as well as the contributors of donations for her welfare showed that there is a sea of people who care. These are people with hearts of gold who are given the opportunity to show themselves in such trying times.
Actually, amidst the turmoil and the savagery that greet us each day as we turn the pages of our newspapers, is a wonderful world filled with beautiful people.
Dianne Odell is certainly an inspiration to all who face challenges in their lives. Despite the odds against her, she went through life, improving herself in ways possible to her and emerged thankful of the love and goodness the people around her had bestowed by reaching out to give children the inspiration to improve themselves. She gave so much of herself despite coming into the world with so much less than the average child.
The world lost a truly beautiful woman on the 28th of May, 2008. Physically, she may be gone but she will always remain in our hearts.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Nagging is not parenting.
I remember a time one father came to see me about his daughter who was in my form four class. He complained that his daughter would not want to return home but stayed with her mother’s sister, the aunt.
I asked him what was the reason for his daughter not wanting to stay with him. He claimed he did not know the reason. He wanted me to talk to his daughter and persuade her to go back to his home.
Since I felt that it was good for the child to be back with her parents again, I told the parent I will see what can be done. So, I sent the parent home and at an appropriate time I approached the student to talk to her. I told her that I knew she was not staying with her parents and wish to know what had transpired to cause such a separation between them.
At first, she was quite reluctant to tell me her problem. I told her that she need not tell me anything, but since her father had approached me, I just hoped that I could be some help in solving the problem. I told her that I have children too, that misunderstanding between a father and his child is very common. It can happen to just anybody. And such matters sometimes need a third party to pave the way back to a better understanding. So, if I could help, I told her, I would do so confidentially.
Then, she told me that her father had been nagging her since he saw her boyfriend visit her. I asked her about the boy and was told that it was an ordinary friend; nothing special yet. I then explained to her that parents are usually very worried about their daughter’s safety; that this is a normal reaction for a parent and she herself would be just as worried when she becomes a parent one day. She seemed understanding enough but what aroused her ire was her father’s nagging. He not only raised the present issue but went into various other past issues. She told me how could she be expected to continue facing all the previous mistakes, some of which were not her fault at all, each time her father meets her.
I sympathized with her and I myself do not approve of nagging or the constant bringing up of old issues to hammer a defenseless person. I say defenceless because the poor child is never allowed to defend herself. Any defence put up by the child can and will be considered as rebelling against the parents’ words. This, I feel is not fair to the child.
So, I promised the student that I would speak to the father about his nagging. At the same time, I expected her to behave herself correctly for I am indirectly responsible for the parent’s trust that the action would achieve the right results.
The next time I met the parent, which was a few days later, I told him exactly what their problem was; nagging. Initially, he refused to admit that he nagged too much and to support his nagging, he brought up all the previous problems. I was patient and listened to all he had to say. My patience and attentiveness, however, encouraged him to repeat again and again the things he had said. It went on like a record (Discs do not have such problems, I presume.) that always jumped back into the same tracks. It got really boring and annoying. I told him the problem, that he was repeating everything so many times that I could understand how fed-up his daughter must have been to face the same old music again and again. No wonder she ran away to stay with that relative of hers. I told him I would the same if I had a father who complained like he did.
Next, I told him that that was no way to teach a child. Yes, it could be true that she was wrong to bring back a boy at her age. However, we must teach or explain to her what could possibly be the danger of her move. In doing so, we must make it clear our concern for her.
Thankfully, everything came out right. The parent stopped his nagging and the girl returned to her family. Maybe it was to prove me right; she was an exemplary student in my class.
When we merely complain about her, what would anyone expect but that she would throw up some kind of defence and her defence could be acceptable. After all, nowadays, young girls get to have boyfriends early and she cannot be expected to be any different from her peers.
So, what is our aim, as a parent? It is to show our concern and love for her, to have her see that she understands what could possibly happen and the possible dangers that parents speculate on. That is all. We bring it up because of our love for her.
However, if we nag and nag, we fail to achieve our aim of expressing our love and care for her. When we nag, especially when we bring up old problems, we are only telling the child she is bad, stupid and needs constant surveillance; she cannot be trusted.
Do we want our child to think that? Do we want her to lose her self-esteem? Do we want her to believe we have a bad impression of her?
Do we know that a child may just rebel by proving us right? What would happen to our poor child and our family then?
So, if we are in the habit of nagging, we ought to think of it. Think of the consequences. Think of how we show approach the problem.
Nagging can happen because of our worry for the ones we love but naggers destroy the very love that started them nagging.
We can stop nagging and start parenting to achieve the best results. We must get our children to work with us for better future, not have them rebel against us in destructive ways. It can be done. The secret lies in knowledge, admitting our own mistakes and having the courage to change. All these are worth it as the benefits are indeed numerous.
I asked him what was the reason for his daughter not wanting to stay with him. He claimed he did not know the reason. He wanted me to talk to his daughter and persuade her to go back to his home.
Since I felt that it was good for the child to be back with her parents again, I told the parent I will see what can be done. So, I sent the parent home and at an appropriate time I approached the student to talk to her. I told her that I knew she was not staying with her parents and wish to know what had transpired to cause such a separation between them.
At first, she was quite reluctant to tell me her problem. I told her that she need not tell me anything, but since her father had approached me, I just hoped that I could be some help in solving the problem. I told her that I have children too, that misunderstanding between a father and his child is very common. It can happen to just anybody. And such matters sometimes need a third party to pave the way back to a better understanding. So, if I could help, I told her, I would do so confidentially.
Then, she told me that her father had been nagging her since he saw her boyfriend visit her. I asked her about the boy and was told that it was an ordinary friend; nothing special yet. I then explained to her that parents are usually very worried about their daughter’s safety; that this is a normal reaction for a parent and she herself would be just as worried when she becomes a parent one day. She seemed understanding enough but what aroused her ire was her father’s nagging. He not only raised the present issue but went into various other past issues. She told me how could she be expected to continue facing all the previous mistakes, some of which were not her fault at all, each time her father meets her.
I sympathized with her and I myself do not approve of nagging or the constant bringing up of old issues to hammer a defenseless person. I say defenceless because the poor child is never allowed to defend herself. Any defence put up by the child can and will be considered as rebelling against the parents’ words. This, I feel is not fair to the child.
So, I promised the student that I would speak to the father about his nagging. At the same time, I expected her to behave herself correctly for I am indirectly responsible for the parent’s trust that the action would achieve the right results.
The next time I met the parent, which was a few days later, I told him exactly what their problem was; nagging. Initially, he refused to admit that he nagged too much and to support his nagging, he brought up all the previous problems. I was patient and listened to all he had to say. My patience and attentiveness, however, encouraged him to repeat again and again the things he had said. It went on like a record (Discs do not have such problems, I presume.) that always jumped back into the same tracks. It got really boring and annoying. I told him the problem, that he was repeating everything so many times that I could understand how fed-up his daughter must have been to face the same old music again and again. No wonder she ran away to stay with that relative of hers. I told him I would the same if I had a father who complained like he did.
Next, I told him that that was no way to teach a child. Yes, it could be true that she was wrong to bring back a boy at her age. However, we must teach or explain to her what could possibly be the danger of her move. In doing so, we must make it clear our concern for her.
Thankfully, everything came out right. The parent stopped his nagging and the girl returned to her family. Maybe it was to prove me right; she was an exemplary student in my class.
When we merely complain about her, what would anyone expect but that she would throw up some kind of defence and her defence could be acceptable. After all, nowadays, young girls get to have boyfriends early and she cannot be expected to be any different from her peers.
So, what is our aim, as a parent? It is to show our concern and love for her, to have her see that she understands what could possibly happen and the possible dangers that parents speculate on. That is all. We bring it up because of our love for her.
However, if we nag and nag, we fail to achieve our aim of expressing our love and care for her. When we nag, especially when we bring up old problems, we are only telling the child she is bad, stupid and needs constant surveillance; she cannot be trusted.
Do we want our child to think that? Do we want her to lose her self-esteem? Do we want her to believe we have a bad impression of her?
Do we know that a child may just rebel by proving us right? What would happen to our poor child and our family then?
So, if we are in the habit of nagging, we ought to think of it. Think of the consequences. Think of how we show approach the problem.
Nagging can happen because of our worry for the ones we love but naggers destroy the very love that started them nagging.
We can stop nagging and start parenting to achieve the best results. We must get our children to work with us for better future, not have them rebel against us in destructive ways. It can be done. The secret lies in knowledge, admitting our own mistakes and having the courage to change. All these are worth it as the benefits are indeed numerous.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Limits in our mind: Complacence can put us into a rut.
Once I told someone about the Art of Living basic course. And without feeling any sensitivity about it as I was merely telling the person what I would myself hope to achieve every day of my life; I told him the course would certainly make him a better person. He was stung by my words. Annoyed with what I had said, he turned and walked away.
At first, I wondered what could have created such a reaction. Then, going over what I had just said, I realized it was his reaction to the words, ‘a better person'. The words must have been an affront to his dignity. I told myself I should not have said those words. He must have thought that he was great enough. How dare anyone belittle him with words which could imply that he was not good enough!
On further thought, I realized it was not my fault that he felt the way he did. Of course, he had the right to feel that way but I too had the right to believe that everyone, including me, can become an even better person, physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally than what we are today. There are still ‘mountains’ to conquer, ‘rivers’ to cross, ‘stars’ to reach for and many, many ways to expand our horizons.
Have you thought about it? The day there is no further growth, be it good or bad, we are either dead or perfect in every way; as perfect as God. I cannot think of anything or anyone more perfect than God. Can you?
I do not think we can be that perfect as each and every one of us has some kind of weakness here and there. So, there is always room for improvement. Buddha reached Nirvana. Have we reached that stage yet? If not, there is still need for improvement and we should try to be better tomorrow than we are today.
Thus, as long as we live, and since we do not exactly know how long we are going to live, we ought to think of what work we can do, what to eat, the best way to exercise our body, to rest sufficiently, to develop spiritually and emotionally so that we will always be progressively better in every way possible for whatever lies ahead.
Is our work enjoyable and fulfilling? If not, what other work can we do? Do we understand nutrition? Is what we eat nutritious enough? How good are we physically? Have we given our body the opportunity to enjoy some form of suitable exercise? Do you realize the importance of rest and sleep? Do we allow this beloved body of us sufficient rest to reenergize it for another day, week, month or year? What about our spiritual development? Of course, the atheist will insist that there is no need for spiritual understanding or development. Are they sure of that? Have they given this sphere of development the chance to show them that spirits exist, that there is a life after death? Have they given themselves the opportunity to open the third eye so that they can see the truth? Are we in control of our emotions or are our emotions in control of us? Are our emotions calm enough to face the challenges of life that lies ahead?
If we know the answers to the above and are practising all the right moves, well and good. If not, why not? What are the obstacles? Are they insurmountable obstacles? Have we thought of overcoming them? Can it be done?
Only we are able to understand our own problems. But are they real problems? Or is it merely a mental obstacle, our mind refusing to push it aside and let a solution or knowledge be found. Our mind can be very stubborn, refusing to let go of things that are a burden to our progress. When that happens, we must put in new ideas and thoughts to overshadow the undesirable ones. Some people call this self-hypnosis when it is merely replacing consistently old negative thoughts with new positive ones. In time, the old negative thoughts fade away while the fresh positive thoughts bring forth good vibes and corresponding good results and progress.
Well, thinking that we already know everything or achieved everything gives us a sense of confidence, value and greatness. What else is there to know? When we truly believe we know everything, a sense of complacency settles in and there is no need to know anything else anymore. One thing such people have found is great happiness. But for how long will such euphoria last when there can be no more improvement? No more progress! That’s all! The progress is stopped by a mere stumbling block thought.
It is like the only guy who found the way to survive the war, gloats about it to himself only for a few days as he eventually realized that there is no more meaning in his life.
At first, I wondered what could have created such a reaction. Then, going over what I had just said, I realized it was his reaction to the words, ‘a better person'. The words must have been an affront to his dignity. I told myself I should not have said those words. He must have thought that he was great enough. How dare anyone belittle him with words which could imply that he was not good enough!
On further thought, I realized it was not my fault that he felt the way he did. Of course, he had the right to feel that way but I too had the right to believe that everyone, including me, can become an even better person, physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally than what we are today. There are still ‘mountains’ to conquer, ‘rivers’ to cross, ‘stars’ to reach for and many, many ways to expand our horizons.
Have you thought about it? The day there is no further growth, be it good or bad, we are either dead or perfect in every way; as perfect as God. I cannot think of anything or anyone more perfect than God. Can you?
I do not think we can be that perfect as each and every one of us has some kind of weakness here and there. So, there is always room for improvement. Buddha reached Nirvana. Have we reached that stage yet? If not, there is still need for improvement and we should try to be better tomorrow than we are today.
Thus, as long as we live, and since we do not exactly know how long we are going to live, we ought to think of what work we can do, what to eat, the best way to exercise our body, to rest sufficiently, to develop spiritually and emotionally so that we will always be progressively better in every way possible for whatever lies ahead.
Is our work enjoyable and fulfilling? If not, what other work can we do? Do we understand nutrition? Is what we eat nutritious enough? How good are we physically? Have we given our body the opportunity to enjoy some form of suitable exercise? Do you realize the importance of rest and sleep? Do we allow this beloved body of us sufficient rest to reenergize it for another day, week, month or year? What about our spiritual development? Of course, the atheist will insist that there is no need for spiritual understanding or development. Are they sure of that? Have they given this sphere of development the chance to show them that spirits exist, that there is a life after death? Have they given themselves the opportunity to open the third eye so that they can see the truth? Are we in control of our emotions or are our emotions in control of us? Are our emotions calm enough to face the challenges of life that lies ahead?
If we know the answers to the above and are practising all the right moves, well and good. If not, why not? What are the obstacles? Are they insurmountable obstacles? Have we thought of overcoming them? Can it be done?
Only we are able to understand our own problems. But are they real problems? Or is it merely a mental obstacle, our mind refusing to push it aside and let a solution or knowledge be found. Our mind can be very stubborn, refusing to let go of things that are a burden to our progress. When that happens, we must put in new ideas and thoughts to overshadow the undesirable ones. Some people call this self-hypnosis when it is merely replacing consistently old negative thoughts with new positive ones. In time, the old negative thoughts fade away while the fresh positive thoughts bring forth good vibes and corresponding good results and progress.
Well, thinking that we already know everything or achieved everything gives us a sense of confidence, value and greatness. What else is there to know? When we truly believe we know everything, a sense of complacency settles in and there is no need to know anything else anymore. One thing such people have found is great happiness. But for how long will such euphoria last when there can be no more improvement? No more progress! That’s all! The progress is stopped by a mere stumbling block thought.
It is like the only guy who found the way to survive the war, gloats about it to himself only for a few days as he eventually realized that there is no more meaning in his life.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Emergency number worldwide for GSM mobile.
Yesterday, a friend sent me the following information which I believe can be useful for everybody, not just for the ladies. After all, the robbers are after just anybody’s money. With unknown dangers lurking at every turn in our lives, it is good to arm ourselves with some knowledge and awareness. Let us be aware of what can happen. Awareness and knowledge, knowing what can happen and how such attacks can come about, help us to react faster and protect ourselves better and what number to call in an emergency. So, please read on.
Ladies especially(Blogger’s note:Not just the ladies.)...please, please read!
It's 112 not 999!
A young lady was robbed and slashed on the face two days ago in Taman Desa.
She just got out of her car and was in front of her friend's house pressing the door bell when she saw a motorbike with two men coming towards her direction. She thought they were security guards. Then before she realized it, one of the men has already slashed her face with a knife and grabbed her bag. She didn't know it was a cut until she touched her face and found out it was bleeding. She was screaming out of shock. One of the man came back (they were already on the motorbike and were ready to leave) and tried to slash her again. Luckily she was able to catch his hand and hold on to it to stop the strike. At that time, her friend came out to check what was happening and the men quickly rode away.
The cut was 9 cm long and 1 cm deep. Look at those robbers' tactic! It is to hurt you first before they rob you so that you are handicapped with an injury and cannot resist them. Even later, when there is someone to help, the helper or helpers have to rescue you first instead of chasing them. Please be alert all the time and take every precautionary measure possible.
Do you know the Emergency Number?
Please be aware the Emergency Number worldwide for GSM Mobile (012, 013, 016, 017, 019) is 112 and not 999.
You can dial 112 even without a Sim Card. If you find yourself out of coverage area of your mobile network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you. Do share this important info with your family members and friends.
Ladies especially(Blogger’s note:Not just the ladies.)...please, please read!
It's 112 not 999!
A young lady was robbed and slashed on the face two days ago in Taman Desa.
She just got out of her car and was in front of her friend's house pressing the door bell when she saw a motorbike with two men coming towards her direction. She thought they were security guards. Then before she realized it, one of the men has already slashed her face with a knife and grabbed her bag. She didn't know it was a cut until she touched her face and found out it was bleeding. She was screaming out of shock. One of the man came back (they were already on the motorbike and were ready to leave) and tried to slash her again. Luckily she was able to catch his hand and hold on to it to stop the strike. At that time, her friend came out to check what was happening and the men quickly rode away.
The cut was 9 cm long and 1 cm deep. Look at those robbers' tactic! It is to hurt you first before they rob you so that you are handicapped with an injury and cannot resist them. Even later, when there is someone to help, the helper or helpers have to rescue you first instead of chasing them. Please be alert all the time and take every precautionary measure possible.
Do you know the Emergency Number?
Please be aware the Emergency Number worldwide for GSM Mobile (012, 013, 016, 017, 019) is 112 and not 999.
You can dial 112 even without a Sim Card. If you find yourself out of coverage area of your mobile network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you. Do share this important info with your family members and friends.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Let not the child learn too many languages at the start.
Yesterday, while I was at my Friday Kriya, a breathing technique, practice, a friend and parent of three children told me her experience when it comes to language learning for children.
She went through the national language medium school which uses the Malay Language. So, she was good at the Malay Language. So, when her first child came, she spoke to him in the Malay Language; while the husband, who was from the Chinese medium school, spoke to the child in Mandarin and the grandpa who went through the English Language medium school spoke in English while the grandma spoke in Hockien which is a Chinese dialect.
The child seemed to understand what they said. However, he could never reply to any of their questions. From his actions in response to their words, he obviously could hear and understand them. The parents became worried. Was he mute?
Consulting a friend who was also a doctor, they were directed to a pediatrician in a hospital in Penang. As a result, it was discovered that the parents and relatives were using too many languages all at once on the child. The child should be allowed to concentrate on one or at the most two languages only at that early stage. That, of course, solved the problem.
Well, it looks like language learning, just like every other thing in our world, should neither be too little or too much. Be moderate. Later, after the child has been able to handle one language fairly well, we can include another language. It ought not to be taught all together at the same time, especially when they are for the first time introduced to languages.
Of course, there are exceptions. Such exceptions cannot be many. You see, I know this parent and her children. All of them are obviously quite intelligent. If intelligent children such as them cannot cope with four or five languages or dialects simultanuously at this first stage of their lives, it has given us the clue that when it comes to languages, too many is too much for beginners to handle and can bring undesirable effects. So, we ought to learn from this experience and benefit from it.
Friday, October 09, 2009
Are your vegetables beneficial to your health?
This morning I was told by a friend that he has always washed his vegetables thoroughly. When asked why he was so particular about the washing, he told me he had many good friends who were farmers. You know, those farmers, according to him, do not eat the vegetables they produce for sale. They have their own plot of land where they grow vegetables for their own consumption. These vegetables are never sprayed with insecticides or pesticides.
These farmers knew that the vegetables sprayed with insecticides and pesticides are toxic to the body. So, they eat organic vegetables while we eat toxic food unless we soak the vegetables for a long time. Do you know that it takes at least fourteen days to ensure that the pesticide is totally disintergrated. That is only for the ordinary pesticides. Of course, for grade one pesticides which are the most powerful, it may take a longer time. In fact, there are some very strong pesticides which take a few months to disintegrate.
Well, today we have enzymes which when put into water for washing vegetables, the enzyme will be able to remove the toxins. I am not too sure about that as there is no conclusive evidence anywhere.
So, the best thing to do when it comes to vegetables is to grow our own organic vegetables. Growing our own vegetables or greens is not difficult. Quite a number of people who have land or earth roadsides at their houses do plant some kind of vegetables for their own consumption.
Growing our own vegetables has its advantages. Knowing that it is definitely organic, we can eat it raw. That is in fact what I do with the greens I plant. Eating raw vegetables and fruits bring a lot of benefits which i shall go into in my next posting.
These farmers knew that the vegetables sprayed with insecticides and pesticides are toxic to the body. So, they eat organic vegetables while we eat toxic food unless we soak the vegetables for a long time. Do you know that it takes at least fourteen days to ensure that the pesticide is totally disintergrated. That is only for the ordinary pesticides. Of course, for grade one pesticides which are the most powerful, it may take a longer time. In fact, there are some very strong pesticides which take a few months to disintegrate.
Well, today we have enzymes which when put into water for washing vegetables, the enzyme will be able to remove the toxins. I am not too sure about that as there is no conclusive evidence anywhere.
So, the best thing to do when it comes to vegetables is to grow our own organic vegetables. Growing our own vegetables or greens is not difficult. Quite a number of people who have land or earth roadsides at their houses do plant some kind of vegetables for their own consumption.
Growing our own vegetables has its advantages. Knowing that it is definitely organic, we can eat it raw. That is in fact what I do with the greens I plant. Eating raw vegetables and fruits bring a lot of benefits which i shall go into in my next posting.
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