Health and appearance can be improved.

The day before, we sat down before a meeting to have a chat among friends. As we were of an age when health has to be maintained, our conversation led us that way. Soon, one of the guys told us about a day when he was going through his photo album and he realised that he somehow looked different, much better than that photograph of himself in the album. Where was the difference? What was it that made the appearance of the younger him older than his present older person? Yes, it was true but the change was so gradual that it went unnoticed until he saw his younger self with an older appearance. Unbelievable even to himself but it was true. He must have gone through in detail every feature on his face before he found that the difference lies in the colour of his hair. When he revealed that to us, I could see that it was true.

And he confirmed it to himself when he visited a friend who was surprised to see his younger appearance with hair darker and with less white hair. According to him, the friend he visited once had totally black hair while he had a lot of white hair. That day they discovered that, where hair is concerned, the once upon a time black haired guy now has a lot of white hair, more than this friend's. How is that possible?

For one thing, this friend whose hair has improved tremendously has retired a few years ago and since then, he has done more exercise than before, walking up the hill a number of times and regularly cycling quite a distance almost every day. In fact, he recently not only cycled up Gunung Jerai, but left some teenagers behind on the way, tired and needing a rest while he cycled on without a stop. Of course, with his bicycle, he gets a trimmer body where once he was flabby. Muscles are firmer, well-toned although his skin was somewhat sun-tanned. Looking at him, I believe he is in great health.

Impressed by his health and the change of hair colour indicating improved circulation and better regeneration of cells, and being constantly interested in health issues, I thought about it last night and this morning, realising that in our conversation we missed a most vital factor on health. Being retired and no more concerned about making money on the foreign exchange, he is more relaxed. Mixing well with everyone regardless of religion and race, his mind is more aware, more open and more able to accept other people as they are. With such a mind, there is only minimal stress.

Stress has been discovered by researchers to be the enemy of human health. Stress can lead to a lower immune system which could allow cancer cells and pathogens to become strong enough to invade and overcome the white blood cells and our defence system. I believe the lessening of stress not only help our immune system, with the help of good nutritious food, exercise and sufficient rest or sleep, it also strengthens our body enabling the proper regeneration of cells to take place at maximum rate.

I believe and know through this friend's hair that it is possible that the roots of the hair could have better supply of the necessary nutrients from their healthy cells brought through better circulation.

I believe all this is possible also through my own conquest of rheumatism and rheumatic heart in my twenties. I have written about that in more detail in an earlier posting on this blog.

Well, I have shared a true experience with you. Hopefully, you can share some of yours (perhaps, through email) so that we can all benefit from them.

Stress in life.

Once I went to an orchid farm in Sungai Dua, Mainland Penang to get orchid plants for my garden. My wife and I got to know the then young owner, Michael, who told us his orchids is his hobby. He would spend time taking us around the place, talking about the beautiful blooms and the various varieties of orchids at his farm.

He was very successful with his farm. To think of it, there was this man who got lots of money just working at his hobby. What an ideal job cause anyone who spends time at his interest could never consider the effort put in as work. There would be no unhealthy stress and happiness is a certainty when the objects of interest produce attractive flowers to be appreciated by other orchid lovers who look forward to possessing the plants.

That is also the reason I choose to do the work I love to enjoy. I have no boss to please and my time is my very own to use as I wish. Do you know that at one time I did not even have a hand-phone so that I do not hear any call for my assistance unless I am ready for it? Life for me is now so much more relaxing and enjoyable.

Unfortunately, there are still people who struggle to achieve certain degrees to please their parents to find that the work their degrees lead them to were not of much interest to them except as a way of earning a salary. It would still be alright if their job was not so stressful as to lead to depression.

This did happen to the daughter of one family. So far, cases of depression which I have heard of happened to the females. Are the ladies more susceptible to depression? Well, perhaps researchers ought to look into this and find the truth of the matter and hopefully discover a solution for it.

Back to this poor young lady who was struck down with depression just a year after being employed. Her nervous breakdown started with her hair turning white and a loss of appetite. By the end of just one year, she was a pathetic sight, unable to face her workload. Since then, she had not been able to work. Unless she finds someone to help her understand her situation and accept it while doing meditation or yoga to remove her stress, this kind of situation is difficult to overcome. However, it does not mean there is no way out. There is always a way out if the person is ready to have it.

I believe this is what happens to people who have no interest whatsoever in their work. It was drudgery, difficult to overcome as those people had to face what they dread each day, every week, month after month, from one year to another with only a slight reprieve during weekends and holidays.

Of course there are people who are made of sterner stuff, never buckling under despite the pressure of boring work day in day out. These are the people who, when they no longer enjoy the work, watch the clock, looking forward to the end of the day when they can just pack up and leave everything behind so that they can find means to release the stress in some creative manner. For such people, they have found a way out of the predicament of being in an uninterested job. Here, the family can help the breadwinner(s) to unwind and save themselves from the problem of stress and depression. For those whithout a family to fall back on, there are friends. And for those introverts who find difficulty with company, you still have a good thirty minutes of jogging or a trek up some hill where you can sweat off the stress, stretch your muscles, then relax them with a warm bath or massage and a cool drink under the stars or while listening to music or watching a show; whatever is your enjoyment.

Knowing this parents ought to allow their children to choose to study their field of inclination. Parents would get happier children with a brighter future, not just in terms of finance, but in all aspects of life. They may never become millionaires but they will be rich in every aspect. Do we really need to be millionaires to be truly happy?

Stress and our attitude towards work.

Today, a lot of people seem to complain about the amount of work they are expected to do. And the pressure to perform their job extraordinarily well gets greater with the present economic situation with retrentment still a threat although part of the world is on the verge of recovery. The danger of a job lost is heightened with increasing prices of everyday necessities.

How do we overcome the pressure that we face at our workplace? The work load cannot be lessened. However, our mind can be adjusted. We can change our attitude towards work.

At this point, I hear a voice from one part of the world demand,"Ai Wei! How do you expect that to be done,ah? Talk is easy, lo, but when it comes to the real thing, I still have this huge pile of files to look into. Just change my attitude and the whole pile of work disappears aah?"

Okay. You're right. It's not easy. Nobody said it's easy, alright. Changing attitude takes some effort. And you're right too that the pile of work will not disappear. It's not magic. You see, it's science. It's how the mind works.

Yes, it is how our mind works. You have a choice in everything you want that mind of yours to behave, or I should say to think. If you prefer to worry, all the worrying thoughts will enter at your command. If you wish to take action, then the mind would start to plan and ideas would come in and if you think that same situation is just the right opportunity for you to show how good you are, your mind will think of ways to finish the job well and it will be happily looking forward to possible rewards. Have you ever experienced that? No?

Then, perhaps, I can bring in a simpler illustration. Let's say that you are a bachelor boy or girl and you get to know a girl or boy. What's in your mind? Beautiful/Handsome? Like him/her? Attracted? Your mind ticks 'Yes'. She/He asks for your help to take her big heavy bags to the airport for her/him. No problem, you would say. Big bags are not a problem. It would be good exercise. You are happy to be asked. It could mean that the person likes me. You would do it. Here's the chance. What a blessing from God!

Aah, what if you had ticked a 'No'. Sorry, lah. I have so much work to do. The time of your plane's departure is not convenient for me to take you there. All kinds of excuses. And if somehow you get persuaded to do it, you would not be happy with the situation, thinking of the huge number of heavy bags to carry. how exhausted you would be. It would be real tiring. That could also be really depressing, right? See, the situation is the same but the attitude is different.

So, let us see what kind of attitude we can put into our work. First of all, let us be positive. How lucky you are to have your job! Well, you are financially secure. There's money to pay the bills. Not enough? That has nothing to do with your job. It has everything to do with money mangement. (I will write on that in another posting.)

Work is to be done. So, we do it. Yes, we put in the work that is expected of us. That is what we are paid to do. If our mind understands that, and we set our mind to it, then there will be no dillydallying at work. If we do our work concientiously, as expected, there will be no pressure, only tiredness. Who does not get tired after a hard day's work? Tiredness at the end of the day is good as it will give us a good night's sleep. No insomnia unless we think of the work negatively. then, perhaps, we may think of kicking the employer the whole night instead of enjoying a good night's sleep.

And if we have worked hard, nobody can expect us to do more than that. So, whatever can not be completed has to be put aside for another day. If you have done your job well, the employer would understand. If the employer cannot understand that, then that employer's business will suffer when his workers run to another company. He and his company will not last.

Look at the banks. Business is always coming in but they have to put a stop to it at a certain time of the day so that the work can be completed. They understand that their workers can only do that much. And if the business is managed well, there is always another day to get more business.

Let us understand that pressure from work comes about when we feel or think that we have been given an unfair amount of work; we have been overloaded with too much work and expected to finish in too short a time. You do not agree, do you?

Okay, let's look at a hawker. The more work his customers give him, getting him to fry non-stop, demanding that they be served fast, the happier he is at the end of the day when he looks at the amount of cash he had gained. Is that overworked, pressured to perform faster hawker stressed or depressed with his workload? No! Far from it. He's delighted with his tiring work.

"Aaah! But that is physical work. It does not tax the mind."

Yeah? How about petition writers who work for themselves? If you see a good popular one with loads of work, ask him whether he is ever too stressed or depressed with his/her work. I do not believe such people would ever feel stressed or depressed with their work. For such people, the more work the happier; slightly stressed maybe, tiring too but happy. Certainly not overly stressed.

See, it's not the amount of work that overstresses a person. It is the thought that the workload is unfair, that too little time is given to complete it. It's the thinking that determines the attitude.

Sometimes, even when the workload is unfair, there is no overstress. Why? If you decide you love a particular type of work, that work becomes a pleasure. You may be tired by the load but your pleasure is not diminished.

Sometimes, it is pride in one's work, in one's achievement. A coach may be willing to work extra hours without extra pay in order to produce athletes with exceptional capabilities. A teacher may put in extra effort to achieve a yearly hundred percent passes for his subject. Why would these people walk the extra mile? It is love, pride and achievement that brings a lot of tiredness and fatique perhaps, but no depression or overstress.

Why do I emphasise on overstress? You see, some stress is good for us. There has to be some stress when we want to please someone, to achieve something better, to show that we are as good as others, if not better. Such types of stress brings us a positive feeling to help us perform well in whatever we wish to do.

It is only too much stress that we wish to avoid as such stress wreaks havoc on our mind and can cause our body to release too much hormones and toxins that can bring sickness to us.

Finding relief from stress and strain.

"Useless fellow! What the hell do you know about these things? We don't need you to tell us what to do. Get lost!" And they walked away, leaving Soon Lee uncertain what to say or do.

However, in his mind, the matter stayed to haunt him throughout the day and that night, he just could not sleep with the words still hammering at him in his mind. It hurt even more as they came from friends he had known for so long. He was just trying to help and that was his reward. He could not let the pain caused by their words go away. He tossed around that whole night until fatigue finally brought relief with his eye-lids drooping down over his eyes and bringing the curtain down on his ordeal.

In life, hurts are easily felt at times and at such times there must be ways to calm the mind, to remove it from the strains we go through.

One of the ways to move away from the stress of life is to move towards nature. Go for a walk in a forest reserve or up a hill. Appreciate the tall, huge trees, the plants and their flowers or fruits. Forget about work and enjoy sounds of nature that abound in such places. Let the cool breeze caress your cheeks, your face and your body. Enjoy the moment.

Instead of walking briskly, you could take a run. I love to run and sweat out all the toxins that comes in with the busy street-polluted air through the nose or with the pesticide laden food through the mouth. True, we can go organic. But how much of what we consume is truly organic. After the run, feel the body relax with a rub-down after a warm-followed-by-cold water bath; the temperature adjusted so as to be comfortable for each individual. It is invigorating, to say the least. The circulation is so much improved.

With such a time-out for yourself, you see the joy of living; that life is not mere drudgery or work, work and work. It is fun and worthwhile. The satisfaction of a hard day's work with such a workout to invigorate your body for whatever the remainder of the day may offer. Your view of life is so much better.

However, I must caution those who are beginning such a move. Go slow and gradually build up your strength and stamina. Give your body a chance to adjust to this wonderful way and you can be sure, you will be glad life is not just work, computer and television or astro.

No unnecessary stress, please.

Yesterday evening, I had this talk with a young teacher who was very passionate about her teaching. It is because of her passion that she felt very sad about the Malaysian schools of the day.

"The headmaster demands that teachers must produce 'A' students. Most parents agree with that. Teachers go into class pressuring the students to produce nothing less than an 'A'. Do you see that? Headmasters put pressure on the teachers, the stressed teachers put pressure on the pupils and pupils end up with all that stress at such a young age. Frankly, I would certainly not want to be a child in such circumstances. No wonder, I read somewhere young school children are committing suicide.

Hell! When everyone thinks results are more important that you and your health, is there anything left to live for? None, my dear friend! nothing!

These so called educationists who are willing to stress our children just to create a name for their school are no better than slave-drivers. And what is the purpose? For that, we have to take a look at education and its main purpose.

What is education? It ought to be a system in which a child is taught to learn. Yes, taught to learn. To be able to learn, to gather information for himself/herself and his/her career, that child should to be systematically introduced to listening, reading and writing. With the basics mastered to the best of the child's ability, education ought to show the child how to use the basics learned to enjoy, understand and be able to manage the tasks of gathering information or knowledge, recording and conveying such information as well as use the acquired knowledge for everyday living and to have a career.

The potential for such development is an individual thing, some being able to achieve more than others, some less. however, with the basics mastered, life can be lived to the full and opportunities for work will be there.

Some children may not achieve high academic levels as they may not be academically inclined. But not everybody needs to be academically inclined. There have been successful people in this world who are not academically inclined. Thus, it does not, in any way, mean that the child who does not do so well academically is in any way inferior to those who can do better.

Why do I say that? As everyone knows, everyone is an individual. As individuals, each has his/her own potentials and abilities. He/She may not be good at memory work but excellent at imagination and foresight, thus capable of planning well.

And that is the reason why I have always said that being only mediocre academically does not a failure make. Success can be found in many fields. And, as I have said, there are sufficient examples of academically not proficient people becoming successful in business. A very simple example is the man who built up the Honda business in Malaysia. There are many more, and those whom I have known personally, I have written about them in this blog.

So, everyone has his/her place on this planet. All can find his/her niche. With that we can have happier and better people in this world. Happier people can never come from pressured, stressed or depressed children.

Stress can lead to many problems affecting health. Stress can take a person to an early death. So, let us find ways to overcome stress, not add on to it. Let us, as parents, release some of the stress building up in our children. Schools are giving our children sufficient pressure, as it is.

Someone could be thinking: That's easy for you to say that. Well, I do not just say it. I never made my children go for tuition. I just ensured that they had the basics through reading and enjoying story-books. I merely encouraged them with lots of praise. I did that with my nephew too. I talked to them often on all the topics I found essential for their growth. Through story-books, they learned language. Ability to understand the teachers was the first step. Then, I ensured that they had enough sleep so as not to have a tired brain unable to stay attentive to what was taught. Nutritious food was, of course, just as important.

Those were the happy, enjoyable process of learning my children went through; definitely without unnecessary stress. Of course, there is a little stress from tests, examinations, homework and the competitive spirit. However, that is healthy stress which is essential for growth.

Exercise and Laugh down the stress.

Last Saturday, The Art of Living Centre in Sungai Petani had a session of exercise and laughter. Members of the public were informed of the event and the centre just had enough space for the many interested children and adults who turned up. The participants of the event went through a number of exercises taught earlier by a hundred year old man who was in very good health at the time he taught The Art of Living members the exercises. Practically every part of the body, from head to toe, was exercised. A number of exercises were good at removing stress. This was especially so with the laughter therapy at the end of part one of the session. Then, the participants were taught the Basrika which is a breathing exercise that calms the mind and brings energy to the whole body. With the body calm and relaxed, the participants lay down to rest, some to nap. From the feedback at the end of the session, the participants enjoyed themselves very much and liked what had been taught. It was a good, beneficial evening for all of them.