Nurture the love you have.

After marriage, how many couples still care for each other just as intensely as during courtship?

Could it be that the hunt for a mate has been successful and the need to woo is no longer necessary?

To answer the above questions, the first requirement is to answer truthfully whether you married your wife out of love or not.

If it is a love marriage, then the feelings ought to continue. It not, then both can help to cultivate feelings of intimacy to achieve a closeness akin to love.

Whatever it is, once there is intimacy, we should continue to care for such intimacy, such feelings of closeness to sustain it till death do we part. I like that: ‘Till death do us part.’ I may be a sentimental fool but I believe the one who thought of that had it right.

You know, after my wife, Soo Kin, passed away, I realised how important her presence was in my life. She was a stabilizing force. With her around, I know there’s someone who truly cares; who really loves and am concerned about my welfare. Of course, friends do too but for how much of the time.

For example, when Soo Kin was sick with stomach ulcer, then during the operation, got what was an unstoppable bacteria which prevented the operation wound from healing and eventually was found to be the victim of a very rare sickness; an over-production of hormones; known as Cushing Syndrome; it was her husband who stayed day and night by her bedside from one hospital to another for approximately seven months.

I believe that if it had been her husband who faced such a sickness then, she would have done the same.

Friends would visit from time to time, giving much need moral support. Parents of Soo Kin’s pupils even provided financial support. All my friends and her friends did whatever they could for her.

But the one person who shared every moment of pain and suffering with her every moment of each and every day and night was the person who loved her truly. No other person could have done more.

As you can see, the one person who matters most in your life is your life partner. Therefore, is it not proper that you look after him or her with love and concern every day of your married life? Eventually, if you have always cared for growth and development of your love and intimacy, that ONE and only will be the person you can always fall back on, the person who will stand by you through thick and thin.

Therefore, my dear friends, do not be careless with your love. Treasure it and the person who shares it with you always. Spare some time each day for such a precious feeling, emotion or person while you can.