Understanding people.

"That couple talks too much," she complained to me.
"What happened?"
"Well, the lady, for example, would talk at such speed that I did not have the chance to put in any comment. She goes on and on and it is so fast there just was no way i could say anything," her annoyed voice clearly told me her unhappiness.
"I thought all of you like each other as only the three of you seem to be able to hit it off," I gave her my observation.
"The other day, she was telling me about their son in Japan again. I wanted to tell her I have heard about that son many times already but she just went on talking so fast as if knowing that I was going to tell her that," She looked unhappy alright.
"I know. Perhaps they have only one son and must be hell of a proud about the son'e achievement. And since yours are the only ears willing to listen, she had to unload everything onto you," I tried to pacify her.
"Hummp! And that husband of hers! You know what happened? The other day, he told me relatives took them to an expensive restaurant and spent RM400 for just a meal for the four of them. And he was so upset about the extravagance! I told him it was alright as it was just once in a long while. At that, his voice was raised and condemnation was written all over his face as he told me never to say 'once in a while'. I was really flabbergasted at his tone of voice, as if he were lecturing his son or daughter. I really never expected that. Oh, my god! He always talks as if only he knows what is right!" and her voice rose a little higher at this point.

I did not want to encourage her to talk more about the couple as she was obviously too heated up at the thought of them and what they had said. Quietly, I told her that it is possible the couple was not fortunate enough to have the matured balance she has and it could be due to a number of factors. The factors could be poverty at childhood stage or when compared with other relatives their parents financial level could be the lowest and these could bring about some kind of inferiority complex. So they have to put on a kind of attitude towards money and success as a shield. It is a complex thing and we ought to be happy that we are not in that kind of situation where we have to put up a superiority complex to counter it. Sad is the situation of such people if they cannot find a way to remove the complex. "And that is why," I explained to her, "The couple, especially the man, always has to win in any argument or discussion. They have to put themselves into a one-track mind to prevent hurt to their fragile ego."

Such people ought to be helped rather than disliked. Of course, during their lifetime, some friend could have to get them to see and understand their problem. Unfortunately, such people are not easily helped unless they themselves can see their own problem and are willing to overcome it. In fact, they are in great need of a psychologist. Even now, they must have not realised that people avoid them because of their 'My way is the best. My method is the only one. No one can be more correct than me' attitude.

Since such people cannot be helped, we should not aggravate the situation but just have a cordial relationship with them, for without clashes there can be no sparks to heat up the atmosphere.