Enjoy your children's presence.

Last night, I met four Asian Scholarship aspirants and their parents.

The children were very confident young people with hopes of being selected to study in Singapore. They faces reflect their confidence and the desire to meet whatever challenges that may come their way. Such is the beauty of youth.

Looking at them I remembered the time my two children were selected after primary school to choose the premier school in Kedah, the Sultan Abdul Hamid or the Pokok Sena Sains School, both of them residential schools. They were offered the places on different years as one is the older of the other. Each time, I took them to have a look at the places so that they could make their own choice. Even though they were at the age of twelve years, I believe they should be allowed that after I have explained to them firstly the advantages and disadvantages that I have learned about in taking up the offers or staying put in a school in Sungai Petani. I explained to them what I thought and what others thought of the offers. Of course, it was a tough choice.

My wife and I had always enjoyed the pleasure of our children's presence at home, and we have always planned our out of work time so that our children can enjoy their interests with us. And so on the day we discovered that we might soon had to part, we were so glad that we had given so much of our time to them. Yes, they did decide to go to the residential science school in Pokok Sena. We were happy for them but we were sad too as we would have so little time with them after that.

But I have always believed that nothing, even our own needs, must stand in the way of our children development and progress. So it was that we had our first experience of separation of love.

We were not to know that for the next one week we could not sleep well, always thinking of what our elder son was doing in that school. Was he alright? Was everything fine? What about the numerous new children that he had been placed in a dorm with. How comfortable was he among so many strangers? Those thoughts assailed us and caused us sleepless nights as we looked forward to the weekend when we would be allowed to travel about 100 kilometers to meet our beloved children.

For Kedah, the weekend starts on a Friday. So it was that a Friday in 1999 saw us going along the highway to Alor Star and from there moved North-East towards that little town of Pokok Sena. For the next three years we made the weekly trip to that place, each time planning on taking our children out some place for them to relax and enjoy before having to return, they to their school and us to our homes for another seven days. Then my poor wife passed away and I had to make the weekly trip to their school alone for the next three years before again still having to miss them as they went on to tertiary education in universities in Malaysia. Now, one of them have passed out but has already flown off to his new job in Langkawi.

So I have always told parents to enjoy their children and be with them as often as time permits for they will grow fast and soon their progress will take them away to whatever future awaits them. I am happy for my children's progress and happiness but that can never lessen the feeling of missing them.

And whenever we can we meet and delight in each other's presence. Thank God, we are so very close.