Elusive happiness.

I remembered telling a friend during my last year in school that should I get a job and have one hundred ringgit a month I would be happy.

Then, I went into teacher training and was given one hundred and fifty ringgit allowance. Although that was enough for me, my happiness with that amount did not last long. Soon, I was looking forward to the day when I would be a trained teacher and earn three hundred and ten ringgit a month. Wow! That was more than double my training allowance. Great it was to have such a big sum of money. With a few months savings I bought a second-hand motorcycle. Beautiful was each day as I took my motorcycle for a ride with the cool wind caressing my cheeks and blowing into my warm face. That was happiness then.

However, before long I realised three hundred and ten was not enough to entertain friends and have dates. And some dates are so choosy; they want to go by car! Hah! But then, not having a car did help separate those who really like you from those who just wanted a good time. Thus, knowledge of that killed the joy of having such a gal as a date. Forget it!

But then, is not a date about just having fun? At that early stage of my dating life, having a fun-loving beautiful girl on my bike was one of the joys of life. but then, there is a price to all that fun. There are expensive places to take them to; night-clubs and lounges, cinemas and outings. Joy and happiness needs money!

For the next few years, I tried everything to get more money. I became the successful agent of one of the then most popular cosmetics in the world, Holiday Magic Cosmetics. Have you heard of that? It was in the early 1970's. I had more money. I had savings. I had more than I needed. Still, true happiness seemed so elusive. With money, we can get into a state of euphoria now and then. But it was never permanent for the simple reason that joy from such materialistic things was never permanent.

I even took out almost all my savings to attend a motivational course by Lawrence Chan tofind my happiness. After the course, I was almost broke. But then, I understood better how happiness can be reached!

Then I became aware that people who have everything are not necessarily the happiest people in the world. I remember there was this young, very famous Taiwanese singer who committed suicide. Hollywood history tells us of well-known actresses who committed suicide. Well-known and rich singers took drugs. They had fame, money, fans, friends and whatever money could buy. Yet, they were not happy.

So, after the motivation course, I thought about happiness. What brings happiness?

Then, I remembered the happy moments I had with my beloved friends. We thrilled ourselves with rides on motorcycles, we arranged parties, we danced, we helped each other, we delighted in each other’s companionship, we joked and we were so happy.

One thing I noticed and that was, we were not thinking of how much money we could get out of our fun. We did not think of what we could benefit from it. We just put our everything into the joy of seeing each other, the pleasure of laughing with each other, the happiness of just being there with our friends.

That was happiness! It was so simple! No formalities, no ego, no need to put up a front! So relaxed! Do you share the same experience?

To me, my friends; people who accept me for what I am; able to share and communicate as well as enjoy moments in our lives; are important. The people we love and care for are important.

Lately, since meeting a friend who showed me the appreciation for nature, I discovered that being with and appreciating nature can bring calmness and serenity to our soul; a serenity that brings with it a quiet happiness to our inner self.

Besides this friend, The Art Of Living taught me to find this happiness from within my own self, through calmness and the serenity the happiness in one's inner core.

Have you ever felt this way? What is happiness to you?