One of the first voice your new born child hears is either yours, your gynaecologist's or a nurse's.
Whoever it may be, the parents are the child's first teacher. What kind of talk are you going to use with the child? Is it going to be baby talk or adult language? Is it going to be 'Ooo..Ahh....' and 'momm...mom..' or is it 'Hello, baby.' and 'Here's your milk.'
Why do we need to teach our child something which will be out-dated by the time he can talk? We should not waste precious time but go straight to good everyday words of whatever language we may want our child to learn.
That was what My wife and I did with our children and they learned to talk and increased their vocabulary very fast.
Parents should talk to their children from the first day they were born. The words our children hear at the age of one day may not come into use for many months to come but what they hear will be stored in their brain. As I had mentioned in an earlier post, researches have found that the foetus could hear and react to sounds even though it is still in the womb.So parents should talk in ordinary everyday language to their as yet unable to speak child so that they are familiar with the sounds of the language when they are ready to speak.
Another method to introduce language to our children, and that was what my wife and I did,is to read simple stories to our children. With this method, I found that my children started enjoying stories at a very young age and there was no necessity to encourage them to be interested as they already were.
After four or five months,at the time when the child is starting to crawl, books with plenty of big pictures and words naming the pictures should be introduced. Parents could teach the children how to 'mouth' the words. By 'mouthing' the words, parents show their child how the words are pronounced. The picture give meaning to the word. To do this, once the child is familiar with the words, point at the picture as the word is pronounced.
Once your child is able to talk which is somewhere between eight months to a year, talk to him/her as often as possible. After this, besides story books, the world is your child's classroom and the resources depend upon the environment and space available to you.
The world is full of audio visual aids and they are yours to use depending upon your willingness to avail such aids to your child. Take your child to the zoo and teach him/her the names of all the animals there together with their sounds and movements. This lesson continues when you return home.Daddy becomes the tiger and roars with claws stretched out to scratch him/her. Just a visit to the zoo and the child learns what a tiger is, how a tger moves, has stripes and a tail, with claws, sharp claws to scratch a little boy/girl. See the amount of vocabulary learned with just one animal at the zoo! And there all so many other animals. Repetition is important. Unlike adults who may find it boring, children find repetition useful for enhancing memory. Who is the teacher who has done this much for your child? You, the first teacher is your child's life.
What about those parents who wishes to teach their children a language in which they are not good at? Well, there is always a way if there is a will. An aunt of mine is not good at English or Mandarin but she taught her grandson both the languages. We shall go into that in a later post.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Learning begins in the womb.
There are some researches who claim that foetus can learn from the 24th week of pregnancy. Well, as parents who want the very best for our children, it is better to heed what these researchers say. You may go to this well-known researcher’s website for further information: www.edu.helsinki.fi/lapset.kertovat/lapset/in_English/Houtilainen.pdf
According to a practicing prenatal music therapist, the foetus has its first language lesson in the womb. According to another researcher, mental stimulation and improved musical ability can be achieved through listening to music while pregnant.
Apparently, sounds, smells and taste begin their development in the womb.
If that be the case or not, would it not be better to try it out on your unborn child, as it certainly can only bring benefits and do no harm.
Thinking along this line, the parents could find quiet moments to talk to the growing foetus, let the foetus listen to soothing music (the Mozart effect) and hopefully give your child a good head start.
When it comes to smells, the mother should expose herself to the better fragrances of nature. Avoid cigarette smoke so that the child may not be addicted to it perhaps.
Taste-buds could be developed according to our knowledge of health. For example, we know that white sugar has empty nutrients and too much may lead to diabetes if not other problems as well. A liking for fat may lead to obesity, while fruits, vegetables, fish and lean meat can lead to better health.
This means that we have to think carefully and make the right choice of words, smells and tastes of the food we consume during pregnancy.
Of course, for some of us, this may be difficult especially when we ourselves as adults have already formed certain habits with words, smells and tastes. As I have mentioned in a previous article, if you wish to give your children that head start, you have to get the knowledge, muster your will and have the strength to carry out your plan.
According to a practicing prenatal music therapist, the foetus has its first language lesson in the womb. According to another researcher, mental stimulation and improved musical ability can be achieved through listening to music while pregnant.
Apparently, sounds, smells and taste begin their development in the womb.
If that be the case or not, would it not be better to try it out on your unborn child, as it certainly can only bring benefits and do no harm.
Thinking along this line, the parents could find quiet moments to talk to the growing foetus, let the foetus listen to soothing music (the Mozart effect) and hopefully give your child a good head start.
When it comes to smells, the mother should expose herself to the better fragrances of nature. Avoid cigarette smoke so that the child may not be addicted to it perhaps.
Taste-buds could be developed according to our knowledge of health. For example, we know that white sugar has empty nutrients and too much may lead to diabetes if not other problems as well. A liking for fat may lead to obesity, while fruits, vegetables, fish and lean meat can lead to better health.
This means that we have to think carefully and make the right choice of words, smells and tastes of the food we consume during pregnancy.
Of course, for some of us, this may be difficult especially when we ourselves as adults have already formed certain habits with words, smells and tastes. As I have mentioned in a previous article, if you wish to give your children that head start, you have to get the knowledge, muster your will and have the strength to carry out your plan.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
The health of your marriage is important.
The health of your marriage is just as important.
Happily married parents are vital to the best growth and development of their children. Loving, happily married parents are the foundation upon which love, joy and peace foster the most desirable environment for the children. Children thrive well and excel in such an environment.
With love, plans for the future of our precious children are constantly worked at delightfully. Have you noticed how tiredness disappears when love appears? So, there can be no neglect, there can be no slack and there can be no loss of interest when there is love.
However, love does diminish with time if there is no mutual care and concern. This is one pothole all parents must learn to avoid or overcome. To overcome it, we just have to water and manure the plant of love regularly. Remember how when we care for somebody, that person’s little weaknesses are acceptable and of no consequence. In the same manner, it is when small weaknesses become unacceptable that love walks out of the heart. And if we examine all those quarrels with our beloved, we will be surprised at how small the problems were; problems which should not have caused any rift in the family. Most of the problems needed merely some understanding and love to overcome them.
However, should there be a break in any marriage relationship, we can expect some sadness, violence and havoc which may sweep aside all thoughts of success for the children. How long this kind of storm has to be endured by the children and subsequently the type of damage to the children depends upon the intensity and period of the storm.
In such circumstances, where storms erupt often, can there still be a head start to success for the children? Where is the love? And where there is no love, can there be joy? Without love and joy, where is there the peaceful environment essential for growth and development of your children? Therefore, such a pothole must be avoided at all cost!
Happily married parents are vital to the best growth and development of their children. Loving, happily married parents are the foundation upon which love, joy and peace foster the most desirable environment for the children. Children thrive well and excel in such an environment.
With love, plans for the future of our precious children are constantly worked at delightfully. Have you noticed how tiredness disappears when love appears? So, there can be no neglect, there can be no slack and there can be no loss of interest when there is love.
However, love does diminish with time if there is no mutual care and concern. This is one pothole all parents must learn to avoid or overcome. To overcome it, we just have to water and manure the plant of love regularly. Remember how when we care for somebody, that person’s little weaknesses are acceptable and of no consequence. In the same manner, it is when small weaknesses become unacceptable that love walks out of the heart. And if we examine all those quarrels with our beloved, we will be surprised at how small the problems were; problems which should not have caused any rift in the family. Most of the problems needed merely some understanding and love to overcome them.
However, should there be a break in any marriage relationship, we can expect some sadness, violence and havoc which may sweep aside all thoughts of success for the children. How long this kind of storm has to be endured by the children and subsequently the type of damage to the children depends upon the intensity and period of the storm.
In such circumstances, where storms erupt often, can there still be a head start to success for the children? Where is the love? And where there is no love, can there be joy? Without love and joy, where is there the peaceful environment essential for growth and development of your children? Therefore, such a pothole must be avoided at all cost!
Monday, January 26, 2009
Who takes your child to success?
Success of your children depends upon four groups or individuals in their lives. They are:
1. You, the parents.
2. The children’s peer group.
3. The teachers.
4. The children themselves.
All children have their parents or guardians, their friends, their teachers to thank for whatever success or failure they may experience in their lives. That is a fact.
Of all the above people, you, the parents, are the most important. As you are the ones who lay the earliest foundations for whatever growth and development, of whatever nature, that may come. Many of your children’s character, health, attitudes, habits and discipline have already been inculcated, to a certain degree, in the children by you and the children’s friends by the time they go under the influence of their teachers. Even then, you play a no lesser part. You are still the ones who are required to guide them in everything which happens all the way to maturity and beyond. So, to be a parent, the responsibility is great; but for our precious children, such responsibility is borne with love and love makes all things possible.
To carry out this responsibility well, we should arm ourselves with the appropriate knowledge, the will to implement such knowledge and the strength to complete it despite some of the storms that may disrupt our plans.
In my future posting, I will write about some of the storms that may disrupt our plans. You are invited to tell us what you know too.
1. You, the parents.
2. The children’s peer group.
3. The teachers.
4. The children themselves.
All children have their parents or guardians, their friends, their teachers to thank for whatever success or failure they may experience in their lives. That is a fact.
Of all the above people, you, the parents, are the most important. As you are the ones who lay the earliest foundations for whatever growth and development, of whatever nature, that may come. Many of your children’s character, health, attitudes, habits and discipline have already been inculcated, to a certain degree, in the children by you and the children’s friends by the time they go under the influence of their teachers. Even then, you play a no lesser part. You are still the ones who are required to guide them in everything which happens all the way to maturity and beyond. So, to be a parent, the responsibility is great; but for our precious children, such responsibility is borne with love and love makes all things possible.
To carry out this responsibility well, we should arm ourselves with the appropriate knowledge, the will to implement such knowledge and the strength to complete it despite some of the storms that may disrupt our plans.
In my future posting, I will write about some of the storms that may disrupt our plans. You are invited to tell us what you know too.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Give your child a head start in life.
Every good parent aspires to be an ideal parent. How far we succeed depends upon what we can achieve with our children. In order to have our children become peaceful, happy, strong, well-developed successful individuals in life, we should think of how our children should be brought up. Knowledge of child psychology and child education is important. We must know of right actions and the consequences of inaction. We must have knowledge of some of the possible potholes in life. We must teach our children, through effective methods, the ways to overcome or avoid them. Then, we ought to think of ways and means as well as the materials available which can enable us to implement our ideas.
So, to succeed with our children,
a) We must have the knowledge of things, situations and events which can affect
our children.
b) We must have the knowledge necessary to prepare our children for their
formal education.
c) We must know what actions to take at certain times of our children’s lives.
d) We should know the consequences of lost opportunities due to inaction.
e) Think of the possible potholes in our children’s lives so that we may
prepare them for such potholes.
f) With the necessary knowledge and the materials available, we can think of
ways and means to give our children a head start in life.
In this blog, how the above can help children to have a head start in life will be revealed. There will be true success stories of some children. My wife and I have used them to help our own children, Jin Seng and Jin Ho, achieve very good results, both given the privilege of studying in the Pokok Sena Science School from form 1 to form 5 before studying in our local universities. Jin Seng is doing his first degree to be a veterinary doctor while Jin Ho is studying Mechanical Engineering. My nephew, Jin Hock, achieved excellent results with an unprecedented 13 A1s in his SPM in 2001. Last year, 2008, he successfully did his masters.
Any comment, knowledge or view which any visitor to this blog can contribute will be much appreciated. Let us share so that more children can be helped to achieve even greater success.
So, to succeed with our children,
a) We must have the knowledge of things, situations and events which can affect
our children.
b) We must have the knowledge necessary to prepare our children for their
formal education.
c) We must know what actions to take at certain times of our children’s lives.
d) We should know the consequences of lost opportunities due to inaction.
e) Think of the possible potholes in our children’s lives so that we may
prepare them for such potholes.
f) With the necessary knowledge and the materials available, we can think of
ways and means to give our children a head start in life.
In this blog, how the above can help children to have a head start in life will be revealed. There will be true success stories of some children. My wife and I have used them to help our own children, Jin Seng and Jin Ho, achieve very good results, both given the privilege of studying in the Pokok Sena Science School from form 1 to form 5 before studying in our local universities. Jin Seng is doing his first degree to be a veterinary doctor while Jin Ho is studying Mechanical Engineering. My nephew, Jin Hock, achieved excellent results with an unprecedented 13 A1s in his SPM in 2001. Last year, 2008, he successfully did his masters.
Any comment, knowledge or view which any visitor to this blog can contribute will be much appreciated. Let us share so that more children can be helped to achieve even greater success.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Own wonderful mind..
A visitor to my blog emailed me with this comment: 'I think a leap of faith is required to believe that we will create whatever we thought. I am sure many parents think of great things their children will achieve, or even the good looks their children will process but they probably never materialised. Otherwise, every child will be athletic, intelligent and good looking. A paranoid parent on the other hand, will have a disastrous child.'
Thoughts are powerful and possess energy to create. You can create what you think if you believe it is possible and then follow through with actions. All inventions began with thoughts. Thoughts energises the mind to produce ideas, ideas provoke actions and actions lead to creations.
Sales people and motivators can tell us how every successful salesman thinks of closing a sale before he goes to a client.
Read or watch 'The Secret' on its website and you are told how powerful the mind is, how powerful thoughts are. In 'The Secret' we are shown how thoughts in our mind attract happenings. Your thoughts put out signals to the universe and this law of attraction responds to your thougths. Search the website for 'The secret.' It is worth watching and understanding how thoughts and the law of attraction can help you.
Regarding 'good looks', psychologists believe it is possible. Take a visit to the gynaecologist's department in hospitals or clinics and you can see the beautiful baby pictures they put up for the pregnant mothers to see and think about.
But, do you think parents would think of or visualise those babies as their own? No, I certainly do not think so. They will see their own image in their child. After all, they would not have their child look like somebody else, certainly not like the face of their neighbour! What would their friends think?
When it comes to intelligence, if parents put enough thought into it, it will happen. Again I refer you to 'The Secret' for further reading on the matter.
Furthermore, according to science, most intelligent people merely use a small portion of their potential. Here, thoughts with strong desires certainly would lead to action and this action would bring results.In this blog, I would like to tell you not only of potholes but the actions to be taken to achieve the desired results and improve the chances of your child achieving greater success.
As for paranoid parents, it is possible for such inferior thoughts to be passed to the child. The child will grow up with thoughts very similar to the parents, unless there is some other stronger influence from someone else on the child. After all, the poor children have to hear such thoughts so often that they seep slowly but gradually into the mind. We have seen this happen in families in our society. Positive parents with positive children, insecure people with insecure children and negative people with negative children.
On a positive note, negative children can change if they come into contact with positive thinking people whom they respect or like, if not loved.Sometimes, books with good examples of positive people may get children to realise their unfavourable position and inspire them to act so as to overcome their weakness.
Let me tell you a true story about myself. I was born into a poor family. Seeing other children enjoying things I could not have, I developed an inferiority complex. I liked to read and from knowledge I gathered from books even during that young age, I understood my problem. I read books by Napolean Hill and Norman Vincent Peale. They helped me to realise that I could overcome my problem and be a more positive person. That belief attracted ideas, materials, happenings and people into my life. Believe me, it was tough to overcome such a complex. I just could not do it on my own. Not that I did not try. So, I read a lot on nutrition, fitness and health. I took up weight-lifting. I developed physical strength. It helped a little when I realised that with my strength, I could be good at some sports. What was even more important, that which helped me to sweep aside my inferiority complex forever, were my friends. They helped me to realise that I could be popular with the boys and girls. Since then, I have such confidence and so positive is my thinking that there is no stranger I cannot approach to talk to. Such friends as mine are a gift from God, attracted by the belief in my mind that it could be achieved.
In a way, it is my own thoughts, thoughts of a better me that drove me towards all the above actions and created a new, very much better me. If I had not thought it possible for me to overcome my problems, I dare not imagine where I would be today. Would I be writing this? Would my ego allow me to even reveal this to you? Thoughts are indeed powerful!
Thoughts are powerful and possess energy to create. You can create what you think if you believe it is possible and then follow through with actions. All inventions began with thoughts. Thoughts energises the mind to produce ideas, ideas provoke actions and actions lead to creations.
Sales people and motivators can tell us how every successful salesman thinks of closing a sale before he goes to a client.
Read or watch 'The Secret' on its website and you are told how powerful the mind is, how powerful thoughts are. In 'The Secret' we are shown how thoughts in our mind attract happenings. Your thoughts put out signals to the universe and this law of attraction responds to your thougths. Search the website for 'The secret.' It is worth watching and understanding how thoughts and the law of attraction can help you.
Regarding 'good looks', psychologists believe it is possible. Take a visit to the gynaecologist's department in hospitals or clinics and you can see the beautiful baby pictures they put up for the pregnant mothers to see and think about.
But, do you think parents would think of or visualise those babies as their own? No, I certainly do not think so. They will see their own image in their child. After all, they would not have their child look like somebody else, certainly not like the face of their neighbour! What would their friends think?
When it comes to intelligence, if parents put enough thought into it, it will happen. Again I refer you to 'The Secret' for further reading on the matter.
Furthermore, according to science, most intelligent people merely use a small portion of their potential. Here, thoughts with strong desires certainly would lead to action and this action would bring results.In this blog, I would like to tell you not only of potholes but the actions to be taken to achieve the desired results and improve the chances of your child achieving greater success.
As for paranoid parents, it is possible for such inferior thoughts to be passed to the child. The child will grow up with thoughts very similar to the parents, unless there is some other stronger influence from someone else on the child. After all, the poor children have to hear such thoughts so often that they seep slowly but gradually into the mind. We have seen this happen in families in our society. Positive parents with positive children, insecure people with insecure children and negative people with negative children.
On a positive note, negative children can change if they come into contact with positive thinking people whom they respect or like, if not loved.Sometimes, books with good examples of positive people may get children to realise their unfavourable position and inspire them to act so as to overcome their weakness.
Let me tell you a true story about myself. I was born into a poor family. Seeing other children enjoying things I could not have, I developed an inferiority complex. I liked to read and from knowledge I gathered from books even during that young age, I understood my problem. I read books by Napolean Hill and Norman Vincent Peale. They helped me to realise that I could overcome my problem and be a more positive person. That belief attracted ideas, materials, happenings and people into my life. Believe me, it was tough to overcome such a complex. I just could not do it on my own. Not that I did not try. So, I read a lot on nutrition, fitness and health. I took up weight-lifting. I developed physical strength. It helped a little when I realised that with my strength, I could be good at some sports. What was even more important, that which helped me to sweep aside my inferiority complex forever, were my friends. They helped me to realise that I could be popular with the boys and girls. Since then, I have such confidence and so positive is my thinking that there is no stranger I cannot approach to talk to. Such friends as mine are a gift from God, attracted by the belief in my mind that it could be achieved.
In a way, it is my own thoughts, thoughts of a better me that drove me towards all the above actions and created a new, very much better me. If I had not thought it possible for me to overcome my problems, I dare not imagine where I would be today. Would I be writing this? Would my ego allow me to even reveal this to you? Thoughts are indeed powerful!
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Babies come from God
My parents and my friends thought my wife and I wanted a long honeymoon when there was no sign of a pregnancy even after three years of marriage. Another year later and we were still enjoying life as just a couple and it was not for want of trying.
As a man who valued happiness more than anything else, I was not worried. The love I had and the joy I felt were all I needed then.
However, my wife began to become restless. She voiced her fears and worry. I did not blame her. After all, she was a woman. Just like any other married woman, she wanted children. Being able to conceive, to feel the beginning of a new life in her womb, to experience pregnancy with all its accompanying emotions and morning sickness, to give birth and to nurture a child with milk from her breast and love from her heart was naturally important to her.
So we started to consult and seek advice from everyone who could help. There were visits to spiritual places and mediums; and the timing of sexual activities to coincide with certain events or happenings. Temperature was measured daily. Our efforts availed us nothing!
Well, we had to go to the specialists on this matter. Thus, we consulted a gynaecologist at a government hospital. The gynaecologist found nothing wrong with her.
"We can do something only if we find some kind of blockage or problem somewhere. Since we see no problem, we can only give you fertility pills and hope for the best.Just be patient." The doctor explained to us.
That started a long period of fertility pill consumption. It brought along some side effects; swinging moods and bad temper. As I was usually nearby, such outbursts from her fell upon me.
Hurt by the outbursts but realising that it was venom from the side-effects, I brushed them aside with understanding and concern. Furthermore, she realised what she had done and usually apologised for her uncontrollable anger, explaining that her temper got the better of her despite knowing that the fertility pills were the source of her problem.
After months of fertility pills and no indication of a pregnancy, we wondered about the quality of the pills given by the hopital. Information lead us to the private clinic with the best gynaecologist in our region. What would anyone expect from a well-known gynaecologist who charged quite a large sum of money? The checkup was the same as that done at the government hospital. Ah, it must be more effective medicine that we were to be prescribed. Oh, no! My wife was flabbergasted to see the same type and brand of fertility pills as those given by the government hospital. That was our last visit to that private clinic. Again, there was no result.
At one particular meeting with some friends, someone said the fault could very well be with the husband. She was a nurse and was able to help get my sperm examined. A sperm count would be done. Early one morning, just before she went to work, I supplied her with sperm in a test-tube.
The result: I was a stud which means there was plenty of sperm.Still no solution!
After more than eight years of fertility pill popping, we decided that God must have other plans for us. So, forget the gynaecologist, forget the pills and forget about having any baby. No more trying! Let's live life with each other and our friends. And that was what we did. Both of us did not have to think of the position of the moon, the tides, the fertile period, the sexual positions and the temperature of my beloved wife's body. All those pressures were gone. The joy of love took over.
And it was on a warm night while enjoying a long holiday that my wife suffered pain in the lower portion of her abdomen. When the pain did not subside at 1.00am. I quickly warded her at the hospital. You know, she had an abortion!
My wife was happy as well as sad. She was sad that she lost the foetus. She was consoled with the knowledge that she could conceive!
A year later, on another long holiday, she felt her tummy was bloated. She complained of the discomfort. At the same she had the hope that it could be another pregnancy. And she was right. The next morning, a visit to her gynaecologist confirmed it.
The gynaecologist who delivered my first child term him as a 'precious baby'. The reason was it took my wife and I ten long years to conceive our first child. According to the gnaecologist, the term ensure the staff give special attention to the baby.
However, for me, every child is precious as they come from God. That must be so, for no modern science on earth, no specialist gynaecologist, no amount of fertility pills could do what love and God did; the gift of two wonderful children! For my wife and I, our children are precious. From my own experience, I realise it is not up to us to determine when our children come to us. Friends helped, gynaecologist did their best, we put in so much effort and all these to no avail. They came when we least expected them to. Finally, it was God's decision.
And this is the reason I name this blog 'Our Precious Children'; the most precious gift from God!
As a man who valued happiness more than anything else, I was not worried. The love I had and the joy I felt were all I needed then.
However, my wife began to become restless. She voiced her fears and worry. I did not blame her. After all, she was a woman. Just like any other married woman, she wanted children. Being able to conceive, to feel the beginning of a new life in her womb, to experience pregnancy with all its accompanying emotions and morning sickness, to give birth and to nurture a child with milk from her breast and love from her heart was naturally important to her.
So we started to consult and seek advice from everyone who could help. There were visits to spiritual places and mediums; and the timing of sexual activities to coincide with certain events or happenings. Temperature was measured daily. Our efforts availed us nothing!
Well, we had to go to the specialists on this matter. Thus, we consulted a gynaecologist at a government hospital. The gynaecologist found nothing wrong with her.
"We can do something only if we find some kind of blockage or problem somewhere. Since we see no problem, we can only give you fertility pills and hope for the best.Just be patient." The doctor explained to us.
That started a long period of fertility pill consumption. It brought along some side effects; swinging moods and bad temper. As I was usually nearby, such outbursts from her fell upon me.
Hurt by the outbursts but realising that it was venom from the side-effects, I brushed them aside with understanding and concern. Furthermore, she realised what she had done and usually apologised for her uncontrollable anger, explaining that her temper got the better of her despite knowing that the fertility pills were the source of her problem.
After months of fertility pills and no indication of a pregnancy, we wondered about the quality of the pills given by the hopital. Information lead us to the private clinic with the best gynaecologist in our region. What would anyone expect from a well-known gynaecologist who charged quite a large sum of money? The checkup was the same as that done at the government hospital. Ah, it must be more effective medicine that we were to be prescribed. Oh, no! My wife was flabbergasted to see the same type and brand of fertility pills as those given by the government hospital. That was our last visit to that private clinic. Again, there was no result.
At one particular meeting with some friends, someone said the fault could very well be with the husband. She was a nurse and was able to help get my sperm examined. A sperm count would be done. Early one morning, just before she went to work, I supplied her with sperm in a test-tube.
The result: I was a stud which means there was plenty of sperm.Still no solution!
After more than eight years of fertility pill popping, we decided that God must have other plans for us. So, forget the gynaecologist, forget the pills and forget about having any baby. No more trying! Let's live life with each other and our friends. And that was what we did. Both of us did not have to think of the position of the moon, the tides, the fertile period, the sexual positions and the temperature of my beloved wife's body. All those pressures were gone. The joy of love took over.
And it was on a warm night while enjoying a long holiday that my wife suffered pain in the lower portion of her abdomen. When the pain did not subside at 1.00am. I quickly warded her at the hospital. You know, she had an abortion!
My wife was happy as well as sad. She was sad that she lost the foetus. She was consoled with the knowledge that she could conceive!
A year later, on another long holiday, she felt her tummy was bloated. She complained of the discomfort. At the same she had the hope that it could be another pregnancy. And she was right. The next morning, a visit to her gynaecologist confirmed it.
The gynaecologist who delivered my first child term him as a 'precious baby'. The reason was it took my wife and I ten long years to conceive our first child. According to the gnaecologist, the term ensure the staff give special attention to the baby.
However, for me, every child is precious as they come from God. That must be so, for no modern science on earth, no specialist gynaecologist, no amount of fertility pills could do what love and God did; the gift of two wonderful children! For my wife and I, our children are precious. From my own experience, I realise it is not up to us to determine when our children come to us. Friends helped, gynaecologist did their best, we put in so much effort and all these to no avail. They came when we least expected them to. Finally, it was God's decision.
And this is the reason I name this blog 'Our Precious Children'; the most precious gift from God!
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Thought have wings.
You are blissfully wedded. You share such beautiful happiness with the one you love. You desire to expand your love. Through the joys of love you conceive a child. What a delightful gift of love it is!
Next nine months are filled with such glowing, radiant expectation. Lovely plans for the new member of your family takes precedence over all other things. You look forward happily to his arrival.
However, happiness is never guaranteed. We can never know what the future may bring. The future can be hazarduous. Nevertheless, we can to a certain degree ensure that life can be happy and successful if we know the many potholes in life and know ways to avoid or overcome them. We can choose to equip ourselves in readiness for such potholes or we can leave things to luck. Of course, there are those whose path is smooth sailing all the way.
One of the potholes in life is careless thinking. Thinking is important as whatever the mind thinks, its thoughts can become reality.
To illustrate, allow me to tell you a true story. Many years ago, my parents took me to visit a newly married couple. The couple was fortunate and the doctor confirmed that the lucky lady was pregnant. Plans were made for the child's arrival. Clothes, a cot and a wardrobe were bought.
"What lovely knobby eyes this wardrobe has!" The lady exclaimed as she touched those smooth shining knobs on the door..
The mother was aghast at her words. Why should she be so upset by her daughter's thought.She believed strongly, like most elderly women then, that the thought of those kind of eyes can be transferred to the unborn child.
Was it superstition? Maybe. I had once thought it to be nothing more than that.
The incident was forgotten until the day the child was born. He was born with two big bulging eyes.
With such eyes, especially if one is sensitive, there are times when other kids may make fun of one's looks and make one's life miserable.
Of course, it does not mean the end of happiness. The child may even make it into an asset with the proper wit and humour. Well, Yul Branner became a successful actor with his bald head!
In fact, when I was a trainee teacher, there was another trainee teacher who had the same bulging eyes. He was successful as a teacher and he was one of the more cheerful people in our group. In his sleep, he looked at us whenever we took at look at him.
However, would it not be nice to have ordinary eyes like everybody else? Well, if you have experienced or know of such things, please share them with us so that we may tread our path through life with better understanding.
Next nine months are filled with such glowing, radiant expectation. Lovely plans for the new member of your family takes precedence over all other things. You look forward happily to his arrival.
However, happiness is never guaranteed. We can never know what the future may bring. The future can be hazarduous. Nevertheless, we can to a certain degree ensure that life can be happy and successful if we know the many potholes in life and know ways to avoid or overcome them. We can choose to equip ourselves in readiness for such potholes or we can leave things to luck. Of course, there are those whose path is smooth sailing all the way.
One of the potholes in life is careless thinking. Thinking is important as whatever the mind thinks, its thoughts can become reality.
To illustrate, allow me to tell you a true story. Many years ago, my parents took me to visit a newly married couple. The couple was fortunate and the doctor confirmed that the lucky lady was pregnant. Plans were made for the child's arrival. Clothes, a cot and a wardrobe were bought.
"What lovely knobby eyes this wardrobe has!" The lady exclaimed as she touched those smooth shining knobs on the door..
The mother was aghast at her words. Why should she be so upset by her daughter's thought.She believed strongly, like most elderly women then, that the thought of those kind of eyes can be transferred to the unborn child.
Was it superstition? Maybe. I had once thought it to be nothing more than that.
The incident was forgotten until the day the child was born. He was born with two big bulging eyes.
With such eyes, especially if one is sensitive, there are times when other kids may make fun of one's looks and make one's life miserable.
Of course, it does not mean the end of happiness. The child may even make it into an asset with the proper wit and humour. Well, Yul Branner became a successful actor with his bald head!
In fact, when I was a trainee teacher, there was another trainee teacher who had the same bulging eyes. He was successful as a teacher and he was one of the more cheerful people in our group. In his sleep, he looked at us whenever we took at look at him.
However, would it not be nice to have ordinary eyes like everybody else? Well, if you have experienced or know of such things, please share them with us so that we may tread our path through life with better understanding.
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