No one knows the weight of another person's problem.

When I wrote 'Betray not the trust of your woman.', a reader commented that no one knows the weight of another person's problem. And I immediately saw the truth of that comment. Because such a comment carry so much truth, I am sincerely grateful for it.

Everyone of us have different experiences in life and therefore no two persons' understanding of any problem can be the same. There are also so many angles to a problem that different people can only catch a particular angle to it and so have a different view of it. Just as that can be so many solutions to our problems, not every solution is applicable to every similar problem, not every solution is perfectly suitable. Even when a solution is applicable, some emotional wound may take different period of times to heal.

In fact it is because of the complexity of all kinds of problems that whatever strategy or solution for anything can only be possible answers and never the only answer to all similar problems. And that is the reason I decided to write this blog so that we can share as many as possible the various ways to avoid problems, the numerous methods that had been used to tackle them and also help people understand the problems faced by others. Also by encouraging others to comment or write about their experiences, we can have more knowledge and better understanding. Yes, it is hoped that different experiences and knowledge can lead to better understanding.

Yes, there are indeed lots of people with great almost unbearable problems that others may not understand, including this writer. If we can only understand that such problems do exist, we can at least sympathise when we come across people with problems who are forced by circumstance to act in certain undesirable ways. So often have I seen certain types of workers being condemned or disrespected because of the undesirability of their work. How many would have questioned further their thoughts and maybe realised that some people are forced by circumstances beyond their control to perform thus. Such disrespect is adding salt to wounds that ought to be salved, to assist if possible.

Of course, I offer views in my blog based on the experiences of my friends and my own with the understanding that my own views are not exactly perfect as my experiences are limited to the knowledge of one human. However, knowing that I also realise that there is still so much to learn and so much to live for, as I have always discovered.

Surely, some of us must think that our problems are so much of a burden that nothing can help. At some time in my life I had thought so too. But with work and so many other happenings, problems can slowly reced into the background, surfacing intermittently only at times of leisure. So, one way I keep my problems from troubling me too much is to concentrate on the activities of living. Of course, as this friend says, the weight of my problem is possibly not as heavy as those of others and therefore could be pushed further aside. And that is true for I have come across people who are so depressed with their problems.

Take for example the poor young teenager whose parents fought their own battles, divorced and went off to some unknown place leaving her behind to be cared for by some uncaring relatives. Why did her parents leave her? Where are they? Will I ever see them again? These are the thoughts that plagued the mind of this sad teenager. To someone else, it could be a small matter. To her, the world had already collapsed even before she had a chance and the capability to shelter herself.

Then there was this young lady who fell in love with a guy who did not appreciate her love. Well, she married him and found that she had the wrong guy for a happy marriage for he was constantly somewhere else, constantly away from her home, returning home only once in a blue moon to have a night of sex before disappearing again for another number of months to only God knows where. When she became pregnant and gave birth to a child, the father was not even around to share the joy. So, despite having a husband, she lived as a single mother with the mother-in-law helping our with limited expenses. Eventually, she saw the light of reality and realised she had no marriage. She cried and told me her painful heartfelt worries about her daughter she had to reluctantly leave behind to be cared for by her parents-in-law. That way she hoped that her child could have a better life as she was leaving the marriage and going into a kind of wilderness with no idea how she was going to survived. From what I see, she was kind and loving. Leaving the child was obviously such a great sacrifice. The last I heard of her she was working as a waitress in a bar. Such was the love of a mother to forfeit the comfort of having her child with her.

Yes, it is a fact that no one knows the weight of another person's problem. We can only share whatever problems we know, know the possible solutions to such problems as well as the ways to avoid falling into such problems and hope in doing so, we may be of help to someone.