The desire to try. Part 1.

"Hey, that's something new."
"Sure, but it looks so black and the noodles are thick."
"Have you taken it before?" I asked.
"No, I rather not have it. I don't know the taste."
"If none of us know how it tastes, let's try it. I'll get two plates of it for us." I insisted.

After eating the 'Hokkien Char', a fried noodle dish with dark thick soya sauce, my friend smilingly admitted it was tasty and she would like to order that again another time.

"See, we must always order things we have not eaten before to get to know their taste. Ohterwise, we'll never know what we'll miss," I told her.

Yes, unless something is obviously too dangerous or wrong to do, we must try it.

Imagine what would have happened if nature had not imbued us with the desire to try things out, to imitate or to attempt the so called impossible.

Beginning with our precious children, if they had not tried to walk at the time when they could not, they would have been unable to do so. Despite the weakness in their legs, they pulled their bodies forward, then crawled and eventually waddled forward clumsily, sometimes to fall, perhaps cry, but to persist until they had strengthen their legs, improved their coordination and straighten their bodies to walk upright just like us.

If they had not tried to talk when they could not, they would have remained mute forever. Fortunately, the desire to try was a natural instinct in them. They uttered unfathomable language, babbled incoherently for a time before their tongues, jaws and mouth managed to coordinate to give out language; initially words, then phrases and clauses ending up with sentences as they gained confidence.

How did they manage to do all that? First, there was the example. You, the parents and others in the surroundings. Yes, you are the ones who showed the way. Your child imitates your walk and your talk. That is the reason children brought up in the wilds by wolves walk around on all fours just as wolves do. And they snarled just as good as any wolf too.

Then, there was the encouragement from you. During the olden days when toys were less or less affordable, children still managed to walk because parents always gave praise for their efforts. Sometimes, over enthusiatic parents tried to quicken the process by forcing the child to walk before the bones had formed properly, resulting in bow-legged children and adults.Nevertheless, the joy of learning is always there in the child and so, though forced, the child would still be happily, laughingly swaying towards the parent.

Well, from the above, we can see how important good examples of what is possible and achievable is to our children and us.

After that, it ought to be encourage and praise, irregardless of the results of their attempts in achieving anything. Never ever let our children down with criticism of their amateurish performance. Even experts and artistes were amateurish while training to be good.

Look at those world-class gymnasts. Watch the ease with which they perform. That performance could not have been without the examples seen or the practices carried out so rigourously for a long period of time. It did not just happen. If they had been heaped upon with loads of criticism and disdain at the beginning of their learning, there would most probably have been no such gymnasts. The much needed confidence would have been lost.

I remember very well one ocassion where a little cried when her piano teacher told her that she has to practise at home if she wants to be good. Upon being asked the reason for her breaking down thus, she told the teacher she just could not find the time to practise. She had to attend to her studies. Why? Her mother hit her hands twice for getting an average of 95 marks. I was aghast at such revelation. I could not contain myself any longer and told her, this uncle who was a teacher then, seldom scored such a high average in an examination.(Yet, this uncle scored enough in the standard six examination in 1958 to be given a place in the then best school in Penang, The Penang Free School. When the child was not around anymore; I did not wish to undermine her confidence in her parents; I told the music teacher how sad it was that parents make such unreasonable demands on their children, putting them to such great stress. Further more, how many of us had ever scored so high marks constantly?

Thus, parents ought to teach their children using encouragement and praise for trying to achieve anything; and when our children are not up to the mark, we should let it on that we are proud of their attempts. The children will learn something for every attempt that they make. They will come to understand their strengths and their weaknesses as well as their limits. They will know of their capabilities, the possibilities and the probabilities in their lives.


How often have adults themselves given up just because they thought they were too clumsy or not knowledgeable enough for a job, even though those jobs could be done through a little know-how?

In a recession such as the present one, we will soon hear of success stories of people who still have the desire to try new jobs. As a saying goes: Just do it! And it can be done. Adults have to tell themselves they can and will as they face each new day. In magazines such as The Readers Digest, we have read of people failing even in good times, in ordinary times and recovering from their failure, learning from it to achieve even greater success.